Recommended for you

How to Help a Friend Who Is Suicidal

Be There and Listen.

Sep 19, 2016

September is Suicide prevention month. If you or a friend need help, here are some tips. Please note that I am far from a professional. I know based on personal experiences what it feels like to be on both sides. I know how dark it can get, I've been there. I have seen the aftermath of these feelings, and what they can do the people around you. I've tried to reach out to my friends who were struggling, just how they have reached out to me. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Below is some ways that you can help. First and for most I want you to know that you are worth it. I know that there isn't anyone in this world that can tell you how fine it is, I know that there isn't anyone who can make it better. However, reaching out to someone can make a huge difference. Stay strong, because people love you. If you are a friend to someone who is struggling, open your ears and most importantly your heart.

I just want to point out some statistics before I begin. According to The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention "Each year 42,773 Americans by suicide" (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention 2016). The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention also mentions that "Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US" (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention 2016). We can't ignore these statistics any longer. We need to reach out and provide help for those in need. We need to treat mental illness just like we would any other illness. I know that this has been said before, but it's critical!

When individuals suffer from suicidal thoughts, they feel weak. Let me tell you how far from the truth this idea is. You are not weak, you should not be ashamed. Something in your brain is causing you to struggle. What we have to do as friends and sufferers is seek help. We must speak up, we can not stay silent.

Do you want to know a surprising fact? The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention says that "Men die by suicide 3.5x more often than women" (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention 2016). Why could this be? It seems that we undermine the feelings of men. Men are less likely to talk about how they are feeling. They are taught at a young age to ignore their feelings. Men should be able to speak about how they are feeling, before their feelings get worse. I know, it's not that easy, but please help your friend out. Do not judge their problems based on gender, mental illness does not discriminate. Actually, "Females attempt suicide three times more often than males. As with suicide deaths, rates of attempted suicide deaths, rates of attempted suicide vary considerably among demographic groups. While males are 4 times more likely than females to die by suicide, females attempt suicide 3 times as often as males" (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention 2016). As you can see, both genders struggle with suicidal thoughts and intentions. However, males are more likely to die during a suicide attempt.

Another important piece of information is that these thoughts do not discriminate on race either. "In 2014, the highest U.S. suicide rate (14.7) was among Whites and the second highest rate (10.9) was among American Indians and Alaska Natives. Much lower and roughly similar rates were found among Hispanics (6.3), Asians and Pacific Islanders (5.9), and African Americans (5.5)" (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention 2016).

Here is one final statistic before I begin. "494,169 people visited a hospital for injuries due to self-harm. This number suggests that approximately 12 people harm themselves for every reported death by suicide" (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention 2016). Remember that self-harm is also an issue. It's used as a coping mechanism and can become an addiction.

As we can see, suicidal thoughts are not discriminatory. They can effect anybody at anytime. Below is some tips for helping those in need.

1. LISTEN.

It is not your job judge. When someone is struggling with suicidal thoughts, the last thing they want is to be judged. When a person tells you how they are feeling, they are taking an important step. Thank them for telling you.

2. Stay away from personal opinion.

I know that you care about your friend, and are worried about them at this point in time. However, you are not a professional. Just take the time to again listen. It is not your job to analyze why they are feeling this way. Sometimes there isn't even a reason.

3. Suggest a professional.

Leave the advice to the professionals. Your friend needs someone who can provide them with the advice that they need. Their counselor or therapist will give them the best treatment that they can.

4. Call someone.

If your friend is in danger, do not be afraid to call the police. If you are in college you can talk to your RA, or call campus police. These individuals are there to help you. They have been trained to deal with these situations before. If your friend gets upset, you should stay calm. You know that getting help is what's best for them.

5. Don't Give Up.

If your friend relapses, don't give up on them. Listen. However, do not overwhelm them. I know you are worried about them , but the best thing for them is sometimes alone time. Also, don't overwhelm yourself. If something negative happens, it is not your fault. Your job is to reach out and be there, however you are not a professional.

My final advice is to be a friend. Sometimes when someone is stuck in this negative mindset, it seems impossible to get through to them. Stay strong and just be there. I can not stress enough the importance of being there.

*Make sure you know your campus resources, or your local resources. Below I provided links for national organizations that can help you. There is also a number for an emergency hotline. If you can do one think for me, please just open an ear.

One last piece of advice: There are apps that can help with self-harm, and or suicidal thoughts. Keep one on your phone just in case.

To Write Love On Her Arms:https://twloha.com/find-help/local-resources/

The National Suicide Prevention Hotline:http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

American Foundation For Suicide Prevention:https://afsp.org/find-support/

The Trevor Project: http://www.thetrevorproject.org/pages/get-help-now

Crisis Text Line: http://www.crisistextline.org/

References

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention . (2016). Suicide Statistics. Retrieved from American Foundation For Suicide Prevention : https://afsp.org/about-suicide/suicide-statistics/

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Entertainment

12 Types Of Drunk Girls You'll See In Every Friend Group

"Getting drunk with your best friends is an experience in and of itself. It takes us on wild and ridiculous adventures with the people we trust with our lives."

University of Minnesota Twin Cities

328

Cloud Front

Getting drunk with your best friends is an experience in and of itself. It takes us on wild and ridiculous adventures with the people we trust with our lives. Each one of you plays a vital role in making sure the night goes (relatively) smoothly.

Keep Reading...Show less

drinking

Entertainment

20 Times When The Kardashians Summed Up Your Finals Week

It's so rude that we have finals.

University of Iowa

Cosmopolitan.com

Finals week is so rude! So, there's no one better to explain it than the Kardashians themselves!

1. When you look at your finals schedule and become immediately overwhelmed:

2. When your professor says that the final is only going to be short answer questions:

3. When you text your parents to tell them that you're going to have a mental breakdown and drop out of college and they're just like:

I'M Sorry You'Re Overwhelmed GIFfrom Keeping Up With The Kardashians GIFs

4. When you're trying to study with friends, but then you realize that you haven't gotten anything done:

Khloe Khloekardashian GIFfrom Khloe GIFs

5. Then you just end up going on your phone.

6. When you're two weeks away from finals and your professor tells you that you should probably start studying now:

7. When you sit down to take your final and the first question hits you like:

8. When you start the practice problems and you're just like:

9. When you're in your final and find a question that you actually know the answer to:

10. When that one annoying kid in your class says that the final was super easy and they aced it:

Hit You In The Throat Serious GIFfrom Hit You In The Throat GIFs

11. When you come back from your 7:30 a.m. final and crash:

12. When your professor tries to teach you new material a week before the final:

13. When you decide to eat away the pain that is finals week by ordering massive amounts of food:

14. Filling out course evaluations for that one difficult professor like:

15. When it's right before your first final and you're just like:

16. When your professor tells that you the final is cumulative:

17. When the kid next to you keeps looking over at your test:

18. Looking back on the outfits that you wore during finals week like:

Kimk Tears GIFfrom Kimk GIFs

19. When it's been two hours and you've only gotten through five notecards:

20. When you finally make it to the end of the week:

kardashians

Lifestyle

10 Signs You Work In A Restaurant

There's always chaos in the restaurant business.

University of Akron

1261

Brisanis

Working in the restaurant industry is possibly the most fundamentally challenging occupation I have ever experienced when it comes to hospitality and customer service. When you go to a five-star restaurant you expect the time of your life, a two hour getaway, a walk through another time period (rustic Italy, France, Spain, etc), or simply a honeymoon undergo. What you don't see are the behind the scenes scut work: carrying trays, polishing glassware and silverware, kitchen chaos, the list is endless. Now, I'm not saying being a host, server, or bartender is the worst thing in the whole wide world, there are definitely worse things. But the fact of the matter is that it isn't always sunshine and rainbows. In the two years that I have spent in restaurant and customer service, I have spoken my share of expletives, yelled at kitchen staff, and dealt with not-so-happy guests. It isn't easy to keep a bright and shiny smile on your face when all you want to do is choke every person who walks near you. Anyone who has spent even two weeks working in a restaurant understands the rigor and stress that comes with it. Restaurant culture is a tiny world in and of itself that operates on its own principles and creates its own society. It even has its own language. The sayings "runner", "corner", and "on a bus" wouldn't make sense to anyone otherwise. My mother and I both work in a restaurant and the best advice I can give someone going out to eat is to treat us like people. Yes...believe it or not we are people, people. Say "please" and "thank you", or stack your cleared plates before a busser gets to the table. Trust me, the gesture goes a lot farther than you may think.

So, if you work in a restaurant, you can relate with the following points. If not, check out how the brain of a restaurant service (or any customer service) worker actually works. See if you can identify any crazy weird habits your friends have a tendency to partake in.

Keep Reading...Show less

restaurant life

Recommended for you

How to Help a Friend Who Is Suicidal

Be There and Listen.

1. LISTEN.

2. Stay away from personal opinion.

3. Suggest a professional.

4. Call someone.

5. Don't Give Up.

References

Subscribe to our Newsletter

"Getting drunk with your best friends is an experience in and of itself. It takes us on wild and ridiculous adventures with the people we trust with our lives."

The Mother Hen

The Instigator

The One Who Always Texts Her Ex

The Shakira

The Philosopher

The Reluctant Homebody

The MMA Fighter

The "I'm Not Even Drunk!" Girl

The Joey Tribbiani

The Horny Toad

The Aspiring Rapper

It's so rude that we have finals.

1. When you look at your finals schedule and become immediately overwhelmed:

2. When your professor says that the final is only going to be short answer questions:

3. When you text your parents to tell them that you're going to have a mental breakdown and drop out of college and they're just like:

4. When you're trying to study with friends, but then you realize that you haven't gotten anything done:

5. Then you just end up going on your phone.

6. When you're two weeks away from finals and your professor tells you that you should probably start studying now:

7. When you sit down to take your final and the first question hits you like:

8. When you start the practice problems and you're just like:

9. When you're in your final and find a question that you actually know the answer to:

10. When that one annoying kid in your class says that the final was super easy and they aced it:

11. When you come back from your 7:30 a.m. final and crash:

12. When your professor tries to teach you new material a week before the final:

13. When you decide to eat away the pain that is finals week by ordering massive amounts of food:

14. Filling out course evaluations for that one difficult professor like:

15. When it's right before your first final and you're just like:

16. When your professor tells that you the final is cumulative:

17. When the kid next to you keeps looking over at your test:

18. Looking back on the outfits that you wore during finals week like:

19. When it's been two hours and you've only gotten through five notecards:

20. When you finally make it to the end of the week:

There's always chaos in the restaurant business.

Anytime you turn a corner the words "corner!" without you even realizing.

People are amazed at how professional you are when speaking to strangers, or on the phone

When we say "table 17 is on a bus", table 17 isn't LITERALLY on a bus.

You understand the frustration of the functions of another existing restaurant when going out to eat.

When you repeat the same spiel 40 times you start to sound like a lifeless robot.

The rush of prime dinner service. The chaos is riveting.

You have "that guy" at a table that makes you want to pull your hair out.

Getting stiffed an entire tip is worse than dealing with a difficult human being.

When you're sitting in a restaurant you don't dare interrupt your servers table presentation.

At the end of the night, you take the first opportunity you get to take a seat.

Not everything you learn in college can be found in a textbook.

Your self control and motivation directly correlate to how close the end of the semester is.

Group projects seem to be something created by the devil himself.

Remember when you were young and you knew everything there was to know? Wrong: you knew nothing.

If there is free food offered - go!

Never believe a professor when they tell you "Don't worry, this won't be on the test."

If you want a relationship with someone, it will take effort.

Check your email before you trudge all the way to class to find out it is cancelled.

You do not need a ton of friends, just a couple of really good ones.

Take the time to do what you love.

Every Saturday you will avoid doing homework like it is the plague. When Sunday rolls around you will complain that you have way too much stuff to do and not enough time to do it.

Your college experience is what you make of it.

Let's start binging!

How To Get Away With Murder

New Girl

Fuller House

Stranger Things

Bob's Burgers

It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Friends

Glee

Grace and Frankie

Criminal Minds

American Horror Story

Trending Topics

Top Creators

Subscribe to our
Newsletter