It has all happened to us; we had a bad day at school or work, or we are simply aren't feeling like ourselves. Feeling distress or sadness can really bring someone down. One can feel like they are off the tracks and go to the support of a dear friend. But, now the roles have reversed. You are now the listening ear, that shoulder to lean on, and that true friend to someone that needs you the most.
Watching a friend get worse and more sad is probably one of the hardest things. No one wants to see someone you love hurting. What makes supporting them hard is that sometimes there is a fine line of what you can and can't say, or maybe when one should just keep their distance. I know sometimes I struggle saying something because it's not what they want to hear, or maybe they are tired of talking about it and what to deal with it on their own. The last thing you want to do is overwhelm the individual.
Here are some tips to help you be the best supporter of your friend in distress:
1.) Be a listening ear: Sometimes, your friend simply has to vent. Without words exchanged, and simply knowing that someone is listening can really help during hard times. Listen to their concerns, why they are hurting, and then act. Don't jump to conclusions without them letting it all out.
2.) Respect their feelings: Even though you may disagree or feel no sympathy as to why they are feeling a certain way you must still act with kindness. Hear and understand where they are coming from. Show them that they can trust you with your friendship, words, and thoughts. This is probably the most crucial tip because it is important to not shut them down.
3.) Take action: This is where you get down and dirty with your friend and show them that you will go to bat for them anytime of the day. Think about tangible goals and how you can help them fix their problem. Be a fixer and a do-er. Try not to sit back, listen to your friend cry help, and expect them to do it all on their own.
4.) Show the Light at the End of the Tunnel: With tangible goals, an end in sight, and a good friend, show them and remind them how good they are. Recall on the times that they were there for you, or perhaps share a similar experience that you had simialr to theirs. Let them know that they aren't alone and that they are strong and can do anything.
It' no fun when your loved ones and friends are going through a rough time. Their world can turn upside down in an instant. Remember all those times they were there for you? Try to do the same for them. Show them love, kindness, listen, take action, and remind them of their strengths.
I pray everyone is happy and healthy.
You are great!
Your friend,
Alexa Rosina.