Finals week can be a stressful time for everyone, so I thought I'd put together a comprehensive guide to having your most productive study session ever. Let me know if I've missed anything!
Open your textbook.
Look how well you're doing already! Finals are so far away and you've already opened the book to study! Never mind that this is the first time you've used the textbook all quarter....
Close your textbook and pick up your phone.
Like I said, you're so far ahead of the game with studying. You deserve a break! So what if you just started studying and the final is tomorrow? You can still afford to put down that just-opened book for a while and do what you do best - waste time.
Scroll through your Facebook feed for 2 hours.
"Oh my god, I can't believe Hannah did that to her hair! And right before finals week? Wow, she's bold." Of course, you can't leave the issue alone without backstalking Hannah's pictures all the way to 2008. Otherwise you won't know the full progression of her haircuts! You won't be able to accurately have an opinion on her new style! Allot multiple hours to this studying stage.
Realize that you haven't talked to your family in a while, so call them and chat until they ask about this quarter's grades.
"Last night I went out to dinner with some friends, and the day before that I went to Chicago and saw the river turn green, and the day before that I volunteered at a day care center!"
"Wait, isn't it reading week? Are you doing any actual studying?"
"Mom, you're breaking up! I can't hear anything you're saying! I'll call you tomorrow, ok?"
*Click*
Spend half an hour thinking about how much you wish your family would stop asking you about grades.
"I'm an adult! I have this under control! I mean, look at how much studying I'm doing! They should trust me more. I'm not wasting their money by goofing off before finals."
Spend another half hour trying to convince yourself to get out of bed.
"Hm, I should open that book again. I really learned a lot last time!"
Take an accidental 3 hour nap.
"What year is it?!?!?"
Jump out of bed and open up your textbook again.
"Ok, I'm totally going to study now. Look at me go! I'm already three whole pages in!"
Get a text from your roommate.
Obviously you have to read it now. Ignoring it would be rude.
Spend the next 45 minutes on Facebook again.
"You would think more things would have changed in the past four hours.... I guess I'll just have to look through my feed super carefully to make sure I didn't miss anything."
Realize it's midnight and decide to call it a day.
"I have all day tomorrow to study. Getting a good night's sleep now would be way more beneficial to my brain anyway."
Wake up the next day and repeat.
Until exactly 12 hours before the final when you freak out and start cramming.
