The other day, I was doing a journal entry for my psychology class about how social media may impact relationships. It got me to think about how much it really does impact the way we communicate and form relationships (friendships or romantic) in negative and positive ways. I never actually stopped to think about how much of the communication I have with my friends is through social media or my phone in general. Whether its through Snapchat or tagging each other in posts on Twitter and Instagram, there is always some form of communication through social media. Is this good or bad? This is where we weigh it out.

For one thing, social media allows us to keep in contact with people all over the world. If your best friend goes away to college, they are just one Skype call away. Also, it can allow us to form new relationships with people, not just keeping up with current ones. Many people nowadays form friendships or romantic relationships online, and there are even specific social media apps for this. Social media is a great way to make new friends from all over the world. This may sound a little intimidating because honestly, sometimes social media can be intimidating. It encompasses what seems like a never-ending amount of information that can be accessed by the click of a button. Sometimes it can be tough to connect with people. I am shy and quiet, so it can be pretty difficult for me to form friendships with people even though I want to. Social media can help people break that barrier of feeling shy, helping them to reach out. There’s just something comforting about being hidden behind a screen (we’ll get more into that later though).

Years ago, people would have to ride their bikes or walk over to their friend’s house, knock on the door, and see if they are home. Now all we have to do is send a text that is delivered to them in a matter of minutes, even seconds, to find out what anyone is doing. We are always looking to be more efficient with time, because people are getting busier and busier. Being in college, it is difficult to find time to balance everything while also still trying to make time for a social life and hold onto the friendships I have. Though I may not see them every day, I am able to communicate with my friends over text and social media, which allows us to keep in touch no matter how busy we get.

On the other hand of all of this, social media can also have its downsides with relationships. For instance, we are more likely to be looking at our phones while waiting in line to get coffee than to strike up a conversation with a stranger. With the uprising of cell phones and social media, we are less likely to interact with people in person on a regular basis. When people may start a conversation with us while waiting in line, we think it’s weird. This was probably not the case many years ago and was seen as “normal” to do. We are constantly looking down at our phones and finding ways to avoid these harmless and possibly impactful social interactions with strangers in the real world. We could be missing out on a potential friendship or an interesting two-minute conversation with a stranger by always tying to escape to the comfort of hiding behind a phone screen. I think that this behavior is becoming the norm in society today.

Another downside of social media and relationships is how it can put pressure on us to post certain things with our partners or friends. Posting romantic photos with a partner or photos of a fun night out with friends is not something that validates the relationships. Of course, it’s great to share these moments and keep them as memories, but sometimes people get carried away and demand to be seen on someone else’s social media. We all exist outside of our Instagram and Twitter accounts. There is no need to seek validation or prove our presence to others. There is also the aspect of FOMO, which is a whole other article in itself.

Those were just some of the things I have noticed in my life and in others’ that have impacted relationships. Of course, there are a lot more positive and negative aspects to this, but those seemed to be the ones that stuck out the most. Social media is a great tool for keeping and forming new friendships, and has many positive sides, but it seems to also be limiting our time spent with people face-to-face.