You know what sucks about being in a House Divide is that there is never an easy answer to explain why you can choose one side and when you do, you’re judged for it. Now, try imagining that “House Divide” being your body, being you, and every fabrication that makes you who you are. Being a biracial young adult is what it feels like being in a divided house. It's so hard to convey your thoughts on what is occurring in the news when you’re trying to sympathize on both sides. I spread love and happiness to any and everyone, regardless of race, because I believe in it, but this is something I can not just not speak on without thinking it completely through. This article is based off the perception of what I am seeing through my eyes. Some things in this article you may not agree on and that is fine, because this is coming from my perspective and everyone does not think the same.

I love every color in me that has created me, but the black in me is angry, hurt, and breaking from the injustice I have witnessed in this world towards African Americans. The White side of me is angry, hurt, and breaking from the fact others can not see nor comprehend the oppression Blacks have to endure just to be granted the “freedom” our Nation was supposed to be founded on. But, wait they were never included in that either. Do you know what I mean by that? Do you know why they are fighting so hard for this equality, respect and consideration with the Black Lives Matter movement? Let me give you a quick History lesson. When the Declaration of Independence was written in 1776, it was a very promising and optimistic document, except it is missing some very important "read between the lines" details. It stated "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness." So, based on this statement it seemed like everyone had it made, that by the grace of God everyone was going to have a fair chance to live up to their potential? Wrong. Black people were not included in this document, because they weren’t even considered to be people, well three fifths of a person, but they were claimed as property. You know what gave them their “freedom”? The Emancipation Proclamation is what gave them their “freedom.”

People are still thinking that Black Lives Matter means that every other life does not matter and to make it worse people now think that police lives do not matter. Black Lives Matter is a statement of rebellion to the fact that through the history of the United States blacks have suffered at the hands of the people who used and abused them to build this “Land of the Free.” Let me be clear on behalf of the Black Lives Matter movement. We said Black Lives Matter, we never said only Black Lives Matter. We know that All Lives Matter and we have supported your lives throughout history and majority of you have vice versa, but right now we need your help with Black Lives Matter. Black lives are in danger and we’re trying to give value to them other than when people try to love our culture, because that is all everyone does. You can love the way we do our hair, glorify our natural God given features, dab on ‘em, idolize all our athletes and rappers, and even get “in formation” but can’t even get in formation with us when it is seriously needed. Stand with us, because you don’t have to be black to feel outraged. The Black Lives Matter movement is NOT an attack on anyone or trying to lessen you as a citizen, but a cry for help - it’s about equality and increasing change for justice. It is about making your voice being heard and being respected as a person. Our greatest responsibility is to use our voice, for there are so many people, too many people in our world who are never heard - even when they scream. That is why we stage sit-ins, hold peaceful protests, and any other effort to be heard. Wouldn’t you do the same if you felt that your human rights did not apply to you the same ways they do to everyone else. Stop trying to disempower the message and silencing the voices of Black Lives Matter. Yes, looking through God's eyes All Lives Matter, but that is not how it is being handled. Instead of responding to a cry for help from the black community positively, it is met with statements of ill-wishes and ignorance. My question to you is: Why are some of you so angry when we want to say that Black Lives Matter? Does that kind of response to three letters not scare you? Don’t say All Lives didn't Matter when individuals are out here trying justify the shootings of black lives, who were following police orders, with any of their past mistakes. All Lives didn't Matter when there is money being poured into mass incarceration instead of public education into impoverished neighborhoods. All Lives didn't Matter when the Syrian refugees need help, but some of us did not want to let them in, but once again All Lives Matter.

If Black Lives Matter bothers you, because it doesn’t say All Lives Matter, but Blue Lives Matter doesn’t bother you, then what really bothers you is the word Black. When people say Black Lives Matter, including myself, that does not mean Blue Lives Don’t Matter. If you took a second to think about it, blue is not an actual color of a person, but the uniform. What really matter are the lives that are within those blue uniforms, because in those uniforms there is a diverse group of officers from white, black, Hispanic or Asian, etc. BUT, even though that is the case, black off duty officers are usually the only ones’ I hear being stereotyped, harassed, and even killed. As a Black Lives Matter support, please do not let anything in the news about innocent cops being killed is something that Black Lives Matter is in favor of. A life for a life is not the goal and if you can mourn the horrendous and unjustified killings of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile and hurt for Charles Kinsey, but celebrate the Dallas Shootings then congratulations. You basically just became everything you hated and despised, which is the display of unlawful brutality and death. Do not be that kind of person, supporter, or “advocate” that will give this movement a bad name or try to tarnish the kind of positivity that we are already generating. Be better than which people want us to be or become. Something that makes me admire how strong the black community is, is Jesse William’s speech and the one quote that sticks out from it for me is, “Just because we’re magic, doesn’t mean we’re not real.” What makes our black magic so beautiful and real is that through everything black people has been through; all the oppression, abuse, and mistreat we still never lost our will to believe in our people to unite and work to achieved a better tomorrow. THAT is what makes our black magic so real, so powerful, and so undeniably beautiful. Through everything that was suppose to break us, we refused to be broken and came back stronger than ever.

One thing that infuriates me is when certain individuals try to compare Black Lives Matter to being a racist organization. Look, just because we post about our people does not mean we are against anyone else. Everyone who thinks Black Lives Matter is a racist organization pushed that notion, we did not. Whoever is throwing around the words “racist” and “racism”, do you even thoroughly know the meaning of the two? Because if you do not, I can break it down for you real quick. Racism is when the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics or abilities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races. But, do you know whom racism applies to? White people. I am not saying all white people are racist ; let's not forget I am also half white so do not think I am not trying to hate on my white side, but this term applies to white people, because white people are infact the most superior group in the United States, in which this ideology was constructed on having or obtaining power. Minorities can be prejudice, because prejudice an unfair feeling of dislike for a person or group because of race, sex, religion, etc. But, neither of those is what Black Lives Matter is about. You want to know a real racist and terrorist group? The Ku Klux Klan. It deliberately says on one of their official websites that, “We hate drugs, homosexuality, abortion and race-mixing, because these things go against God's law and they are destroying all white nations.” Their key word on their page that is repeated numerously is “hate”. Not ONCE did Black Lives Matter movement said we hated any person, but we hate unlawful killings and injustice brutality of innocents which reflects on the majority of the black community.

Another thing that gets me is that it has been stated that Black Lives Matter is getting special privileges that everyone else does not have. You can say that there is black privilege, but can’t even come to terms with the fact White Privilege actually exists. Well show me this “black privilege”, Please show me Where!? If you call following protocol and notifying an officer that you have a licensed weapon just to be shot is what one considered black privilege, to be taken down with six bullets in your chest when you had the owner's permission to sell CD’s outside of their store black privilege, or to go into a store just to be followed around, because they think you’re going to steal is black privilege. Systemic Racism is another form of our black privilege and something other minorities know too well. Systemic Racism describes forms of racism which are structured into political and social institutions. It occurs when organizations, institutions or governments discriminate, either deliberately or indirectly, against certain groups of people to limit their rights. This includes:

• Wealth Gap
• Employment
• Housing Discrimination
• Government Surveillance
• Incarceration
• Drug Arrests
• Immigration Arrests
• Infant Mortality
• Education

All these incidents that I have foretold as well as systemic racism is our “Black Privilege” and can you honestly say you would personally want to be in the situations we endure, you’re lying. I personally have experienced black and white privilege growing up. I have been followed in a store when I was with my cousins and I have been told to “put that back”, because I did not look like I had the means to afford it. White privilege is when I walk into a boutique with my hair straighten and greeted with, “Hello ma’am, how may help you” and my mother walking in five minutes after me met with smug expression and turned up noses. Not a single hello and then a change of demeanor from the store owners towards myself when I established that this black woman was my mother. White privilege is sending in two job application using my first name/last name and middle name/last name with both having the same qualifications, but only one getting a call back, because of my name. As a person being half white, I recognize this privilege and it is truly sad. The problem with talking about white privilege with those who benefit from it is where it can get tough. It ‘s the categorization of people that make it so. Whenever white people truly believe in something, they’re referred to as passionate; however, whenever a black person has the same drive for the issue, they’re angry. Understand that white privilege is something that can not be passed off to one of another, can give us a better understanding of what all it truly affects- in order to do this though, we still have to acknowledge that it exists, and knowing that equality cannot truly be achieved if we don’t try to do something to be better. I think it is sad that the one thing I remember growing up was the fact my father stressed to my mother than when I grew up and it came to getting a job, I should always put white on my application. It was he knew for a fact that I would have better life opportunities. At the age of twenty, do you know what I did with that piece of advice? I threw it out the window, because I’d be damned if I let the color of my skin be the reason I succeed in my life. Regardless of the color of my skin I will work to earn what I feel like I deserved and give and be respected for my character not because the spelling of my name or the color of my parents. If I used my race for anything it would be for the betterment and bridging this gap I see between the people of the United States from being too scared to vocalize the things that occurring right in front of our faces.

Right at this moment is the problem that is causing a rift between police officers and the community. Let's just get the bad out of the way that way we can have the good at the end to outweigh all this negativity I am about to cover. All these awful cops (yes, I am talking about all the bad ones) are overshadowing all the great one’s and it is sad. As a cop you swore and took an oath to serve and protect, not to abuse your authority and use unnecessary force to kill innocents and instill fear to others. Your job is to detain and apprehend a potential treat. That position does not give you the clearance to become someone’s judge, jury, or executioner. Last time I checked a person is innocent until proven guilty and no everyone is their past; because you know people can change. Blue is the color of your uniform, but not the person you are everyday of your life. Without your uniform you are an everyday citizen that could encounter situations SOME of you officers put people in. We do not hate police and of course we know your lives matter, what we hate is police brutality and that some of you who can not admit when one of your brothers in blue seriously fuck up. That is what is making the community mad is that no one is holding them accountable for their actions. That is all we want is accountability and no one justifying their actions when clearly it was murder. Part of the four cardinal rules of firearm safety is that you learn at the police academy is to know your target, what’s before it, and what is beyond it. If you can not do that nor bring your implicit bias toward black people to your job, especially with the position you hold, then one might need to find another career. “Even with videotaped evidence of police destroying black people many freedom-loving Americans remain unconvinced of a systemic problem” (Jesse Williams). Something that makes me mad and is a little off topic is the fact when the Orlando shooting occurred and 49 people were killed, people said if everyone were allowed to carry a gun, they’d be safe. Now after Philando Castile was shot and murdered, we’re told he would have been safe if he had not been arm. Which one is it?

To the amazing officers out there that represent amd uphold their uniform very well, I just want ro say I am sorry and thank you. Thank you for putting your lives on the line everyday despite of what has being circulating around. I also want to say I am sorry that the false narritative is the only side that is being portrayed of you all regardless of how much good a majority you officers do. The one thing that breaks my heart is that a vast amount of people do not want to interact with police nor do they want their children to either. Growing up, the police were and still are my friends. I try to remember all the positive influence they had in my life when incidents like this happen. My great grandmother's house was beside the police department for over forty-three years until it burned down a year ago. As long as I can remember, when I was growing up the police department was very active in my family and I lives. When we would have birthday parties for my cousins and I when we were little, they would walk over from the department with plastic police hats, badges, pencils, and handcuffs. Not only would they come over, they would stay and play games with us. I remember my family making to go plates for them to put in the break room fridges, because sometimes they did not have enough time to get lunch. After School I would walk through a path to the gas station and come pack and the officers would be washing their cars in the pack. Anytime I would have a chance they would let me help and during the Summer we would have water gun fights. Even today when I’m home from school and in town, it never fails if they see me, they check in me or my family to see how my family is doing. In a world of chaos, be a Tommy Norman. If you do not know who Officer Tommy Norman is, I suggest you become familiar with him. His Instagram is tnorman23. He is the true definition of policing for the community. You have to realize you can not be there for your community if you’re always in your patrol car. Get out, become active, and get involved with your community; get to know them personally and form a bond. You’ll be surprise how they can help you out as much as you help them.

If we are suppose to be one nation under God, then if we have a problem it is all our problems. Instead of trying to act like it isn’t there, because we’re afraid of what everyone is going to say, we should face it head on. Regardless of what is done in the dark it will come to the light. The lord said love thy neighbor and if all If all lives are supposed to matter and your neighbor needs help making sure Black Lives Matter and All Lives Matter merge into one. I think if we go back thinking and having an optimistic mind of a child we would be better off. Children do not see wrongdoings, hatred, or race, but they see the potential to love some that they feel has to potential of loving back without a hindering thought. A House Divided cannot stand on its own, which is why the people need to work on a stronger and better foundation so our houses can merge as one house for anyone to be up under, to be able to stand in knowing that if anything happens anyone of neighbors within house will be there. Everyone says the world is where it is at this moment, because we have turned our back on God and lost sight of things, but how do you think God feels seeing that we turned our backs on our brothers and sister when they needed our help the most? After all we are all made in his image and he makes no mistakes. So, there is no mistake that he could be even more disappointed on how things are being handled than we are at this moment. Doesn’t that put things in a new perspective for you? I am biracial for a reason and regardless of the fact that both the white and the black in me are angry, hurt, and breaking, but they are not broken, because I have hope that things can change. We, all of us, have to do more than just say it, but actions behind our words, because if you want something to change, you have to go other and BE the change you want in this world. That is the only way it will get better. Arm yourself, not with guns, but the optimism and mentality to do something. I know some of you out there are going to be reading this article agreeing, thinking, or being mad as hell and if you end up doing all three, then I did something right. I know another half will pondering this question, “This happen like two weeks ago, why is she still talking about it?” Because this kind of stuff does not just go away, this kind of division does not just go away, this kind of hate does not just go away. We have to work at it everyday, all of us. “No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his [her] background or his [her] religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite (Nelson Mandela). Because “hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that” (Martin Luther King). We have to start finding the love for one another gain, because if we do not, a house divided cannot stand against itself.