I flip through old episodes on USA, newer episodes on NBC and OnDemand, and sometimes I even reach out to Netflix so I can get my fix. Having been a loyal and devoted fan of Law and Order: SVU for the past few years, I know all of the tricks to watching episodes without having to sit through reruns. Through the hours I’ve spent observing the detectives solve crimes and bring justice to the people, I have learned much more than just how to recite the opening sequence. Who knows, maybe some of these tips will help you some day.
1. Never take a sip of water when you’re at the station
You’re probably thinking “Wow, these officers sure are nice offering me something to drink while they question me.” The truth is, they don’t care about your thirst or comfort; they want your DNA. Along with not drinking out of any cup they hand you, it would be highly advised to not blow your nose, spit at an officer, get blood from an open wound on any surface, or smoke a cigarette that they hand you.
2. Always say “I want a lawyer"
Just about every single character, innocent or guilty, has said this line when picked up off the streets or brought in for questioning. I don’t know for sure, but it seems like every character’s go-to phrase.
3. The ADA will always request remand and your defense attorney will always say "That's crazy, your honor. My client is no flight risk and has ties to the community."
Every. Single. Time.
4. The Medical Examiner is a genius
She almost always can say within seconds of the detectives walking in that the victim was a seventeen-year-old girl that was sexually assaulted once she was already dead and ultimately died from blunt force trauma to the head.
5. The first suspect is never guilty
How could you possibly have an entire hour long episode if the serial killer/rapist is the guy they found at the scene and they take in as a possible perpetrator?
6. Olivia Benson is a total badass
Now this is just a straight up fact that is unable to be argued. She has stared death in the eyes time and time again. She puts perps in their place. She delivers truths about domestic violence and sexual assault time and time again. She is the greatest mom for Noah. She doesn’t need a man in her life (but every couple seasons she finds one). What else can I say? She’s a total badass.
7. Elliot Stabler is invincible
It’s like every time they tried to kill him off the show he changed his mind and was like “Yeah, actually I will stay for another season” so they have to fix up his gunshot wound right above his heart or have him spend a few days in the hospital after sustaining a head injury, then they hand him the script for next season.