11 Reasons You Should Disagree With Fat Amy's 'Horizontal Running' | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

11 Reasons You Should Disagree With Fat Amy's 'Horizontal Running'

Vertical running is the way to go.

1427
11 Reasons You Should Disagree With Fat Amy's 'Horizontal Running'
Janelle Ward

I remember when the first “Pitch Perfect” movie came out in 2012, aka my freshman year of high school. Freshman year was the peak of my One Direction phase, the single year I wore my retainer every day, and the time it was most acceptable to post selfies with the ‘duck face.’ Most importantly, however, freshman year was the year I started running.

I joined the cross country team in the fall and somehow made it through our seven-mile workouts with only one casualty (r.i.p. My pinky toenail). I absolutely fell in love with running, and Fat Amy’s funny one-liner, ‘I’m horizontal running!’ did not hit as close to home for me as it did for my friends who sat on the couch every weekend watching “Mean Girls” and eating Nutella.

Here are some reasons why you should also disagree with Fat Amy’s ‘horizontal running.’

1. ‘Runner’s high’ is something everyone should experience.

No, it’s not a myth. When you finish a run, your whole body relaxes and releases feel-good endorphins and you feel on top of the world. Even better, you can use this energy to power the rest of your day.

2. You can eat everything in your fridge and still be hungry.

I’d like to take this time to apologize to my mom for making her go to the grocery store every other day to supply the black hole in my stomach. If you’re a runner, expect to go through thousands of fruit snack packets, hundreds of peanut butter banana sandwiches, and gallons of chocolate milk per season.

3. Running is a great excuse to spend some time outside.

Really nothing is better than the feeling of trail running on a nice, sunny day.

4. You feel the difference in your muscles.

I’ll admit it, I definitely had to take the elevator after the first day of practice, but after three weeks I could easily double the stairs, and I probably would have run up them if it was socially acceptable to do so in high school.

5. It’s actually an amazing total body workout.

Running isn’t just for your legs. You’ll also notice some definition in your arms, abs, and even your mind.

6. If you run with other people, the bond you have with them is so strong.

My team and I spent countless hours together for six out of the seven days of the week. We endured tough practices, early mornings, and several injuries together. We depended on each other for encouragement as we finished a race whether we beat our personal record or fell a few seconds, or sometimes minutes, short.

7. Running relieves stress.

It often serves as a sort of meditation. You are able to sort your thoughts as you run, and it’s always nice to imagine yourself running away from your problems.

8. Your confidence will skyrocket.

You are strong. You are smart. You are hot. You’ll find this mantra repeating in your mind if you’ve been running for long enough.

9. Running gives you an impressive hobby.

Are you ever at a loss for words when people ask for a fun fact? Imagine the look on their faces when you tell them you've run six times a week every week for years, or that you’re training for a half or full marathon. Impressive.

10. You’ll sleep like a baby.

I never understood this expression because babies are awful sleepers, but you get the idea. There is no sleep medicine like getting some good miles in during the day.

11. Going on a run is always worth it.

No matter what I’m going through, whether I’m exhausted from school, work, or just life, running is a constant in my life. The wonderful feeling that I get from going on a run carries over into the rest of my day and, eventually, other parts of my life. It is always worth it.

So, sorry Fat Amy, I’m going to continue to set my alarm and strap on my shoes because, I gotta say, horizontal running is not for me.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
campus
CampusExplorer

New year, new semester, not the same old thing. This semester will be a semester to redeem all the mistakes made in the previous five months.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

Let's face it, last semester you woke up with enough time to brush your teeth and get to class and even then you were about 10 minutes late and rollin' in with some pretty unfortunate bed head. This semester we will set our alarms, wake up with time to get ready, and get to class on time!

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The 5 Painfully True Stages Of Camping Out At The Library

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

806
woman reading a book while sitting on black leather 3-seat couch
Photo by Seven Shooter on Unsplash

And so it begins.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

Camping out at the library is not for the faint of heart. You need to go in as a warrior. You usually have brought supplies (laptop, chargers, and textbooks) and sustenance (water, snacks, and blanket/sweatpants) since the battle will be for an undetermined length of time. Perhaps it is one assignment or perhaps it's four. You are motivated and prepared; you don’t doubt the assignment(s) will take time, but you know it couldn’t be that long.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The 14 Stages Of The Last Week Of Class

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

613
black marker on notebook

December... it's full of finals, due dates, Mariah Carey, and the holidays. It's the worst time of the year, but the best because after finals, you get to not think about classes for a month and catch up on all the sleep you lost throughout the semester. But what's worse than finals week is the last week of classes, when all the due dates you've put off can no longer be put off anymore.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 20 Thoughts College Students Have During Finals

The ultimate list and gif guide to a college student's brain during finals.

42
winter

Thanksgiving break is over and Christmas is just around the corner and that means, for most college students, one hellish thing — finals week. It's the one time of year in which the library becomes over populated and mental breakdowns are most frequent. There is no way to avoid it or a cure for the pain that it brings. All we can do is hunker down with our books, order some Dominos, and pray that it will all be over soon. Luckily, we are not alone in this suffering. To prove it, here are just a few of the many deranged thoughts that go through a college student's mind during finals week.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

28 Daily Thoughts of College Students

"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

1304
group of people sitting on bench near trees duting daytime

I know every college student has daily thoughts throughout their day. Whether you're walking on campus or attending class, we always have thoughts running a mile a minute through our heads. We may be wondering why we even showed up to class because we'd rather be sleeping, or when the professor announces that we have a test and you have an immediate panic attack.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments