In Honor of Chris Hawthorne
Your smile lightened every crevice,
While your laughter rang through every wall.
The glue that bound heart and soul,
the bond that made our family whole.
My dear brother, Why did you go?
The pain in my heart fills every hole.
No goodbyes could I utter
while your voice still rings in the echoes of my mind.
You are dearly missed, but my heart will not faint.
Though grief and pain assault my soul ,
I shall see you again on that celestial shore.
I shall not say farewell because this is not the end,
until next time my dear friend, until I get to witness that joyful smile again.
I will honor your legacy with love and compassion
trust me, my brother, you are will never be forgotten.
Everyone experiences grief at some point in this brief life. It ravishes the soul and breaks down the heart, but I want to honor someone who made a difference in my life. So instead of explaining what happened let me describe to you who exactly Chris Hawthorne was.
Chris is my big brother and someone that I always looked up to, but I am not quite sure I ever told him that. He carried laughter around in his pocket and could make you smile at the drop of a hat. He had this zest for life that exceeded anyone I had ever seen in my life. Yes, his life was not always roses and sugar plums but somehow, he learned to find joy in it all. Some of my fondest memories of Chris are when he would light up the room with his stories. His crazy sound effects and funny perceptive on life experience could somehow make your life a little bit more joyful. Every time he would see me he always had funny comebacks or would mess up my hair was he walked by, or the car rides during the spring months when I was younger with the windows down music up.
The most striking thing about him though was his servant's heart that pushed him to serve before his own needs. If you needed something he was there by your side and his family was always first. He lived the life that was provided him to the fullest extent possible and if there ever was someone that I looked up to it was my brother. It hurts never being able to tell him exactly how much I love him before he was snatched away without a notice. It stings that for the past year or so I had been too busy to stop and spend time with my own brother. To never let him know until I stood at his grave to tell him how much he is loved and how much I care about that constant strength in my life. One day I hope to express to him just exactly how much he meant to me, but for now, I refuse to ever let that be a regret again. If it is one thing he taught me it was to live life to the best of your abilities, love God, and love your family.
So instead of ending this on a sad note, go and hug your sibling or parents. Let them know exactly how much they mean to you. Despite how busy life gets, just pick up the phone and call or text that person who made a difference in your life and let them know. We all have those personal heroes who you look up to. I aspire to spread smiles and laughter around like my brother did, and I will try my best to appreciate ever single day that I have with the ones that I love. Until till next time!
