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香港的盥洗室

厕所不是你想上向上就能上的

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香港的盥洗室
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古今中外,论何处的厕所文化最博大精深,香港必能称霸。

2011年第一次去香港考托福。我一心只读圣贤书,连琳琅满目的港式美食或街景都无心享受,却被考场明亮气派的洗手间深深地震撼了。考场地处新界公屋区附近的公立小学,设备老旧爱掉链子(做听力时停电了一小时),但是洗手间却毫不输于白金汉宫。洗手液,手纸应有尽有,让北京著名的故宫五星级盥洗室都相形见绌。

香港托福之旅后,我的内心好是感慨:香港连一个三流小学的洗手间都如此气派,让我们深圳这些蚊香味阴魂不散的省重点中学情何以堪!

后来我去了美帝留学(也算见了墙外的市面),每逢去香港还是会被其精英厕所文化感叹。

我发现原来香港许多厕所都是带锁的。一次我去金钟CBD级别的写字楼找朋友玩,办公室的一面大落地窗鸟瞰会展中心。在喝了两斤冻柠茶后,忍不住问朋友在哪里可以解决生理问题。朋友从抽屉里掏出一把钥匙扣比小米手机还大的钥匙,说 “出了后门,先向左拐,直走,再。。。对了,要用钥匙开门。”

走出奢华的办公室,沿着七弯八拐的小道,终于抵达了所谓 “带锁的厕所” 。洗手间矮小,昏暗“Ladies”字样已经模糊不清。我突然明白了为何一个小小的钥匙要拴上一个砖头大的钥匙扣。这把钥匙是如此的珍贵,有了它就好比山区人民有人金坷垃。

我回家后抱怨,说香港不近人情,连上洗手间都要专用钥匙。父亲想了想,说“香港是什么地方?寸土寸金,厕所可不是你想去就能去的。”

我想有道理。可能香港比较西化,比较注重privacy,administrators不想让闲杂人等随便去bathroom里面玩耍吧。可是一细想,诶?不对啊!说到理念西化,为什么美帝的厕所宽敞明亮来者不拒?还有啊,难道这世界上真有闲杂人等没事跑到厕所里玩水?

在我的印象中,香港变了。香港洗手间不再是记忆中文明,平等的代名词。如厕不再是一个与生俱来的权力,而是一个只有统治阶级才能享有的特权。

再后来因工作原因我需要在香港住一段时间。既来之则安之是中华名族的传统美德不是吗?一个人不能要求社会来适应你,而是要学会适应这个社会不是吗?于是我决定试着接受“香港思维” 接受精英厕所文化。但后来我又发现许多土生土长的港男港女也不能很好地融入这种文化:如果在餐厅里有生理需求忘了领神奇的小钥匙,港人也会爆粗。

好在我上班的香港大学的洗手间是没有锁的。毕竟每天有这么多国外的专家学者交换生游客来来往往,不能让别人觉得香港人小气不是吗?Maybe这阐释了一种“我家大门常打开”的哲理。

哦,对了,听说那个高端写字楼的男厕最近被人撬了。看来人都是被逼的。

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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