My Hometown Is Weirder Than Yours | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

My Hometown Is Weirder Than Yours

(And I love it more than I can say)

67
My Hometown Is Weirder Than Yours
Panoramio

You hear all sorts of stories about small-town life. You know, the hilarious and deliciously scandalous tales of crazy neighbors and weird traditions that are clearly insane, but the storyteller talks about them like they're talking about what to make for dinner.

Well, my town is made of those stories. Every time I talk about it, people look at me with this great mixture of concern and confusion before proceeding to ask if I grew up in a cult. But nope, that's just my town: a quaint yet endearing little hodgepodge of strange.

The town began as a Methodist camp and has historic status. We have fewer than 600 residents, but we're self-governed. We may not have any industry, but we do have two tennis courts and a pond that we call a lake. Our street signs are wooden and hand-painted with plants and their scientific names. My legal address is a grassy path. We have a theme song (and a band to play it). Most importantly, the 2000 census found there to be an average of 1.8 cats per family.

But the best (and weirdest) thing about my town is its traditions, some of which date back generations. My favorites are the Fourth of July and Labor Day Weekend.

For the Fourth of July, my town has so much spirit it cannot be contained in one day. We spend one day playing a town-wide baseball game and having a huge potluck picnic (a staple of town events). Then, on the fourth, everyone dresses up like it's Halloween in July and goes to the park to sign up for costume judging. Then our band lines up on the gravel road into the park and begins to play the anthem while the American flag is raised. A rifle fires a salute, and the parade begins. It is led by our mayor on a tractor and followed by the band and a legion of screeching kazoos. The parade marches all around town, ending up at our town hall, playing patriotic songs all the while. The final song is the town anthem, and everyone gathered sings along. Then the costume judging begins. Everyone who signs up gets a prize, of course, from "Best Red, White, and Blue Fairy Princess" to "Best Yankee Doodle Fireman." Finally, everyone who wants to lines up to ring the town bell, and the day is done.

But that is only one event.

Saturday morning, two days before Labor Day. People gather in herds on the field, which is littered with tires, inner tubes, soccer balls, softballs, and sacks. This is the location of the field events: the soccer kick, the 60-yard dash, the softball toss, the sack race, the obstacle course, and the egg toss, all with multiple age categories. Then, the best event of all: the Triathlon.

The task is thus: Alone or in a team, entrants must paddle around the lake (read: pond) in an inner tube, bike five miles around town, and run two miles to the tennis courts where hoards of people lay waiting to congratulate the winner, who will receive the town's highest honor. But that comes later. There are still two more days.

On Sunday are the shorter bike and running races. They're pretty standard affair, except for the very first race. This is because it is entirely toddlers on bikes. A bunch of little toddlers on their little tricycles seeing who can pedal their little legs faster. It's adorable.

On Monday, we have a croquet tournament followed by an awards ceremony and potluck (I told you it was a staple of town events). Here, the second and third place winners of every event get little ribbons, and the first place winners receive medals made by our resident potter. Not the Triathlon winner, though. No, that paragon of human achievement is given a fancy cup (also made, of course, by our resident potter).

Now, this is only a taste of my town. There is so much more: the Holiday Program, Music Weekend, the Flower Show, Summer In the Parks, Easter, Halloween, Bluestoberfest, and so, so many potlucks. This doesn't give you an idea of the people, who are so friendly and wonderful it can be uncanny. I can't tell you all the crazy stories of its past, like the group my parents were in which practiced military drills with croquet mallets (???).

In the ridiculously dramatic yet beautiful words of my town's first mayor, my home is “a town within a forest, an oasis of tranquility and a rustic jewel in the diadem of the great free state of Maryland.”

In other words, my town is crazy and weird and I wouldn't have wanted to grow up anywhere else.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

A Few Thoughts Every College Freshman Has

The transition into adulthood is never easy

11761
Mays Island
Courtney Jones

Today I started my third week of college at Minnesota State Moorhead. I have survived welcome week, finding my classes on the first day, and being an awkward loner in the dining hall. Even though I have yet to be here for a month, I have already experienced many thoughts and problems that only a new college student can relate to.

Keep Reading...Show less
college

"Make sure to get involved when you're in college!"

We've all heard some variation of this phrase, whether it came from parents, other family members, friends, RAs, or college-related articles. And, like many clichés, it's true for the most part. Getting involved during your college years can help you make friends, build your resume, and feel connected to your campus. However, these commitments can get stressful if you're dealing with personal issues, need to work, or aren't sure how to balance classes and everything else going on during the semester.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

9 Reasons Why Friends Are Essential In College

College without friends is like peanut butter without jelly.

5269
Bridgaline Liberati and friends
Bridgaline Liberati

In college, one of the essential things to have is friends. Yes, textbooks, a laptop, and other school supplies are important but friends are essential. Friends are that support system everybody needs. The more friends you have the better the support system you have. But you also have someone to share experiences with. And don’t settle for just one or two friends because 8 out of 10 times they are busy and you are studying all alone. Or they have other friend groups that do not include you. Don’t settle for just one or two friends; make as many friends as you can. After the first couple of weeks of college, most friend groups are set and you may be without friends.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Power of Dressing Up

Why it pays to leave the hoodie at home.

3907
sneakers and heels
Sister | Brother Style - Word Press

For a moment your world is spinning. The phone alarm has just scared you awake and you’re flooded by daunting thoughts of the day ahead. You have three assignments due and little time to work on them because of your job. You’re running late because you’ve hit snooze one to many times after yesterday’s long hours. You dizzily reach for a hoodie, craving its comfort, and rush for a speedy exit, praying you will have time to pick up coffee. Does this sound familiar?

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Signs You Live At The Library As Told by 'Parks And Recreation'

A few signs that you may live in the library whether you'd like to admit it or not.

3442
brown wooden book shelves with books

Finals week is upon us. It is a magical time of year during which college students everywhere flock to the library in attempt to learn a semester's worth of knowledge in only a week. For some students, it's their first time in the library all semester, maybe ever. Others have slaved away many nights under the fluorescent lights, and are slightly annoyed to find their study space being invaded by amateurs. While these newbies wander aimlessly around the first floor, hopelessly trying to find a table, the OGs of the library are already on the third floor long tables deep into their studies. Here is a few signs that you may live in the library, whether you'd like to admit it or not.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments