How To Tell If She A Hoe | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

How To Tell If She A Hoe

As Told By Bored Men On Twitter

157959
How To Tell If She A Hoe

Boys, we all know the struggle in the dating world. It's hard to find a good girl these days, right? As Chris Brown, a man with a fantastic relationship record, has sang, "These hoes ain't loyal".

Sometimes it's hard to tell if a female is a hoe -- she can look completely innocent and you wouldn't even know her "hoe tendencies." Things may get a bit confusing, so I have gathered a handful of tweets from men all over the world. They have carefully researched the signs of being a hoe and have evidence to back it up.

I have made it easier than ever to spot a potential hoe, so this way you can steer away from her. Keep reading to find out what makes a hoe, a hoe.


1. The Dog Filter

So, according to MANY boys on Twitter, using the dog filter on Snapchat indicates that a woman is a hoe. This has been said over and over again by heterosexual males, so it must be true! They have repeated this experiment many times, so this theory of the Dog Filter being a Hoe Filter has legitimacy. So men, if she uses the dog filter, then she a hoe.

2. The Flower Crown Filter

Apparently, this is taking over the Dog Filter as the new "hoe filter". But boys, don't be fooled. She still a hoe despite which filter she uses! Obviously, flowers imply that a girl sleeps around with boys. Therefore only whores use this filter.




3. Birth Control

Even though birth control can help for a handful of reasons (i.e. getting rid of acne, regulating mensuration cycles, fighting certain cancers, helps those with anemia), a girl only uses it so she can hoe around. You know she's sleeping around with a bunch of dudes if she's taking birth control (despite the fact that she can be in a committed, loyal, monogamous relationship and still be on the pill). How dare she be prepared to have protected sex and save herself from unwanted pregnancies?

Also, condoms as well mean you a hoe. If you're not on birth control, then you're not allowed to carry condoms either. You're not allowed to have protected sex at all, actually.

4. Clothing

Before, the average civilian could tell if a female was a hoe based on how much clothing she was wearing (it's simple math: the less clothes you wear, the more guys you sleep with. It's easy access and you're asking for it, duh). But now, in 2016, everything has gotten more complicated. Your wardrobe can determine your level of hoe-ness.

Only men can wear adidas, duh! Their "women's" department should just be nicknamed "Hoe Department"...am I right?!

Yeah, so if you liked the Cheetah Girls when you were younger -- you were also a hoe by association.

Although you are probably covered head to toe, you're still a hoe if you wear this combination of clothing. Leggings are fine, crop tops are fine, but both together?????? Then she a hoe.


5. Social Media/Technology/Entertainment

According to these surveyed bored men who probably don't ever get laid because they're too busy policing the lives of women, there are certain aspects of entertainment that only hoes partake in.

All girls who have a Twitter account are hoes, it's science.

I don't even know how to add more to this. Twitter user ArlisDoNotChill has provided an argument that no one can even counterattack. His logical is impermeable.

Speaking of impermeable logic, Ca$h has shown another sign of hoe-ability. If a girl has more than 100 followers on social media, you know it's all the guys she's sleeping with. When he was undeservingly called out for having over 100 Twitter followers, he provided an excellent argument (below).

You tried Baelyy, you tried.

Only sluts can enjoy an award-winning TV show about the music industry.

Ignore the fact that she could be well at typing because of all the papers she has written, if she can type without looking then she's deff a hoe. She's obviously an expert at sliding into DM's.

6. Miscellaneous

There are many other signs, so keep reading so you can be as far away from dating a hoe as possible!

This is actually true and backed up by evidence. My 11-year-old cousin is 4'9 and loves all the members of One Direction, even Zayn. She a hoe!

Females have to be in bed at 10:00pm. That is the universal bedtime for all females. If a female were to break this, then she a hoe. Thank you, $$$IMP DADDI.

Because only hoes can be attracted to an entire race. Non-hoe girls cannot like "black dudes".


We all know what grandmothers are teaching girls these days! Bible studies? More like d*ck studies! Thanks, nan!


I hoped that this article has helped all of the innocent men out there trying to find a woman that is wifey-material. You all deserve a loyal woman with a body count of less than 1, that will cook for you when you come home from your job at the McDonald's drive thru. #TeamNoHoe

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Adulting

18 Things I Want To Do Now That I'm 18

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1576
Happy Birthday Cake

For the entirety of my high school career, I was always seen as the goody-two-shoes. I never got in trouble with a teacher, I kept stellar grades, and when I wasn't doing extracurricular activities, I was at home studying. Even when I did go out, it was usually with a bunch of fellow band geeks. The night would end before 11:00 PM and the only controversial activity would be a fight based on who unfairly won a round of Apples-to-Apples when someone else clearly had a better card (I promise I'm not still holding a grudge).

Now that I'm officially an adult, I want to pursue some new things. I want to experience life in a way that I never allowed myself to do prior to entering college. These are the years that I'm supposed to embark on a journey of self-discovery, so what better way to do that than to create a bucket list?

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics

The holiday classics that shaped my life

958
10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics
Flickr

The holiday season is full of stress, debt, and forced conversation. While we rush through the month of December, it's important to take a step back and enjoy the moments before they're gone. Most families love to watch Christmas movies, but these beloved films provide more than entertainment. Here are 10 life lessons that I've learned from the holiday classics we watch every year.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

200140
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

20846
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments