Sometimes "The High Road" Isn't The Route To Healing | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Community

Sometimes The High Road Isn't The Route Toward Healing

Only travel in the direction that aids you mentally and emotionally.

269
Abby Davis
Abby Davis

I have a lot of friends who designate both a "low" and "high" road in their social situations. We've always been taught to opt for the latter when striving to grow up as the most morally sound individuals we can possibly be, but I've come to realize that these are just choices. Not always are we going to find a glaringly obvious route to take after enduring something problematic, and usually with another person. That would require immense objectivity and the lines aren't always drawn so clearly for either party.

Yes, I'm an advocate for doing the "right" thing, but the phrase itself implies a degree of subjectivity. Right for whom? Does the "right" option always present itself as swallowing one's pride and making amends even if you weren't really even at fault? Is it allowing for another's upper hand in a relationship when said person isn't treating you the way you deserve?

The practice of sacrificing something emotional or mental of your own just because someone in your life isn't cooperating, understanding, or mirroring your social behavior is wrong. Compensation for another's faults – especially when they aren't on your team – isn't commendable nor healthy in most cases.

Sometimes it just puts those of us with the "right" hearts in the wrong places.

Now, hear me out, I'm all about doing what is perceived as the "right" thing. I do my very best to recognize my faults, mend what I can, and move on. This usually makes everyone feel better.

But, I've stood witness to way too many of my friends, in a number of contexts, apologizing or taking a hit when the other person hadn't even considered doing so. I'm incredibly guilty of this from time to time as well, but I am working to gauge social situations for what they really are and how they could be put to bed when it seems like I can only anticipate a standstill.

Now, of course, my relatively objective perspective of my loved ones' lives crafts a clearer lens with which I can see how they are being screwed over sometimes. And, duh, my bias given their relationship to me creates a ridiculous amount of defensiveness I have in ensuring they are being treated with decency and respect.

The amount of friends I've comforted after a romantic or platonic breakup who still maintain contact with a former significant other or best friend immediately after being emotionally damaged is startling. I've been in those worn and painful shoes. And, though the last thing I'd want to do was cease any and all communication, the vulnerability and messy train of thought blur any apt decision-making.

But, you are allowed to be pissed. You have permission to block someone if they've caused you trouble or harm, and you don't have to apologize or feel bad for it.

Acting indifferent, perfectly normal, or even sorry is not going to make you the better person at the end of the day if it remains unjustified.

In fact, if we really want to pursue the morally correct path for ourselves, we need to start experiencing our emotions as they are and let them take us wherever they see fit.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
friends
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

If I have learned one thing in my lifetime, it is that friends are a privilege. No one is required to give you their company and yet there is some sort of shared connection that keeps you together. And from that friendship, you may even find yourself lucky enough to have a few more friends, thus forming a group. Here are just a few signs that prove your current friend group is the ultimate friend group.

Keep Reading...Show less
ross and monica
FanPop

When it comes to television, there’s very few sets of on-screen siblings that a lot of us can relate to. Only those who have grown up with siblings knows what it feels like to fight, prank, and love a sibling. Ross and Monica Geller were definitely overbearing and overshared some things through the series of "Friends," but they captured perfectly what real siblings feel in real life. Some of their antics were funny, some were a little weird but all of them are completely relatable to brothers and sisters everywhere.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Types Of Sorority Girls

Who really makes up your chapter...

1795
Sorority Girls
Owl Eyes Magazine

College is a great place to meet people, especially through Greek life. If you look closely at sororities, you'll quickly see there are many different types of girls you will meet.

1. The Legacy.

Her sister was a member, her mom was a member, all of her aunts were members, and her grandma was a member. She has been waiting her whole life to wear these letters and cried hysterically on bid day. Although she can act entitled at times, you can bet she is one of the most enthusiastic sisters.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

10 Reasons Why Life Is Better In The Summertime

Winter blues got you down? Summer is just around the corner!

1539
coconut tree near shore within mountain range
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

Every kid in college and/or high school dreams of summer the moment they walk through the door on the first day back in September. It becomes harder and harder to focus in classes and while doing assignments as the days get closer. The winter has been lagging, the days are short and dark, and no one is quite themselves due to lack of energy and sunlight. Let's face it: life is ten times better in the summertime.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

10 Things That Describe You and Your College Friends

The craziest, funniest, and most unforgettable college memories are impossible to create without an amazing group of friends.

1203
College Friends
Marina Lombardi

1. You'll never run out of clothes when you have at least four closets to choose from.

2. You embrace and encourage each other’s horrible, yet remarkable dance moves.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments