I start my senior year of high school in 10 days. (I wrote that previous sentence and stared at my computer screen for at least 10 minutes, reading those words over and over again.) I had to write and deliver a speech for my senior ring ceremony and, typically, the words just flow from my head to my fingers and all the way onto paper, just like that. That time, it was unusually difficult to convey how I felt and why I felt that way. As I sat stumped, like a kid in kindergarten attempting to read, I was in utter disbelief of how hard it was to write about the one thing I was most passionate about: My high school, Captain Shreve. After an unbelievable amount of crumpled papers, I finally realized what the problem was. I was writing a speech about senior year and it was so difficult because I refused to believe I would have to leave the home, or school, that built me this time next year. To be completely honest–some of you will laugh at me for this–I cried. That ring was so much more than a special occasion piece of jewelry to me, and maybe, hopefully, to some of you. Captain Shreve Gator or not, I think the memories and nostalgia that were the inspiration behind this speech are not just a testimony to my school in particular, but to senior year for all of us.
In that senior ring, I saw the first time I walked up those steps on the first day of my freshmen year. I remember being scared out of my mind, wondering why in the world grown men were walking around with backpacks. I can see a little, freshmen year version of myself shaking in her boots before her first midterm. I remember thinking the world would come to an end if I didn’t pass, and praying time would go by slow before I had to take a final at the end of the year. I see my first high school football jamboree, jumping and screaming alongside the seniors that graciously took me under their wing that year. I remember feeling so cool walking in beside kids that were so much older, and so much more experienced than I was. I see the day that I set my biggest high school goal: Becoming Student Council President at the end of my junior year. I remember thinking it was impossible for such a quiet kid like myself to hold such an incredible honor like that. I see the days I will never forget, the days I found myself as a Gator at Captain Shreve.
In that ring, I pictured my first day of senior year–the beginning of the end. I imagined getting out of my car to find my friends and walking up those same steps and into those glass doors feeling on top of the world. I pictured my very last football game. I imagined wearing my crazy, striped green and gold overalls for the last time, going home without a voice, and only hoping I could stand in those bleachers cheering on the team I love one more time. I picture taking my last final. I imagine I won’t be too terribly disappointed about that one, but it’s just another thing that will mean my time at Captain Shreve is slowly coming to an end. I picture receiving my cap and gown, immediately wondering what it’ll be like to walk across the stage to receive a diploma. I imagine being torn between wanting to leave and wanting to stay, wanting to stay with the people I love in a round building that is all too familiar.
What I saw in that ring may be, probably will be, different than what you saw. Though this is true, the idea is still the same–it represents the past and the future, but it also represents the present. Thankfully, that wasn’t a graduation speech–there’s still time. We still have time to reach a goal, meet a best friend, make an impact. Soon, our time in high school will come to an end. It will come quicker than we can even blink, and we’ll wish we could go back and do it all over again (eventually...for some of us). Enjoy your first day, even though it means sleeping in on weekdays is no longer possible. Enjoy your classes, you’ll never again sit in a classroom full of people you know. Enjoy your last football game, that sense of family you feel while cheering on the football team or any other team is one I can guarantee you won’t find anywhere else. Enjoy your teachers, they care about you and your success more than your professors ever will. Enjoy your last midterm, no matter how much sleep you lost to pass. Enjoy the last trek up the stairs, no matter how painful and hard it is to climb all three flights. Enjoy your senior year, it’s a year you can never get back. We’ll enjoy all of our lasts, and look forward to our firsts in a new chapter of life. When that time comes, and from those halls I leave, my thoughts will forever and always turn me back to my days at Captain Shreve: The days that lacked adult responsibility and were filled with youth, surrounded by the best of friends and the best of times–the days we’ll never get back. Here’s to making them count.