Recently my life has consisted of drastic changes. Some are blessings in disguise while others...well let's just say every time I get to thinking about it I break my heart over and over and over again. I think I've always been one to welcome change, but recently I've tried to avoid it. From graduating high school to the grown up world (sort of) I never thought my life would have changed so much. I've experienced so many failures, from not getting internships (that I wanted so badly) to failing classes and losing people that I once cared deeply about. With every new change I began to experience, I was unsure of how to cope with it. I didn't like the feeling and so I wanted "stability." I wanted constant reassurance from everything and everyone, but honestly, that's not life. Even without noticing it I was changing but instead of welcoming change I began to hate it. I began to beat myself up over everything and anything that went wrong. I started to have the mindset that I was doing something wrong or that I was not worth it. I began to believe less in myself and started to become bitter. I could feel myself becoming unhappy. I was becoming angry with myself over things I knew I had no control of BUT here I was bitter at the world because everything was "GOING WRONG." They thing is that even though I knew I had no control over it, and people were constantly telling me, I couldn't help but feel hopeless. Feel as if that I didn't want to be a disappointment to not only the people around me but to myself. I was done with trying new things. I was scared to start something new in fear that it would only amount to another failure and I was "DONE" with setting myself up for failure ...again. It wasn't until one sleepless night scrolling down my "Only 10 minutes on Tumblr" which in fact turned into a few hours, that I came across this quote:
"It’s okay to restart and recreate. Don’t spend time beating yourself up over something that went wrong. There’s always another chance."-Unknown
There is always another chance....
Now I strongly that everyone deserves a second chance, but never a third or more for the SAME mistake. After that it's not a mistake it's a choice. Like Marvin J. Ashton once said:
“Be the one who nurtures and builds. Be the one who has an understanding and a forgiving heart one who looks for the best in people. Leave people better than you found them.”
When mistake are made the first time they are truly unintentional (hopefully). Therefore mistakes are meant for you to learn from them. HOWEVER, the one person that needs infinite chances and forgiveness is yourself. Sadly in the end people come and go, that is inevitable, but you're always going to be around. So instead of being hard on yourself learn to forgive yourself. Learn from your mistakes and DO NOT repeat them. Instead try to improve, and don't be so hard on yourself. However in order for that to happen change needs to occur. If something went wrong then change your attitude, do something different, try to change bad habits into good ones, change something AND everything. And once you "restart and recreate" Instead of telling yourself that you're not good enough or you can't do it, try a little better than last time. Change is necessary if you want to go far in life and improve overall. Change is life and that is one thing you will NEVER have control of. Therefore instead of hating life and hating what it consist of which is constant change, welcome it and learn to see it as an opportunity that you may not have wanted or need but is necessary to move forward.