It's hard to define what a healthy relationship is for everyone. There is no overarching definition because what may work for one couple, may be toxic for another. But the main theme should be happiness. A healthy relationship is a happy one. Sure, there may be arguments and disagreements and plenty of moments where you look at them and wonder just how they can be THAT stubborn. All couples have those moments, and it's actually quite good to have some tiny disagreements.
Most people have experienced all types of crazy when it comes to dating. You have the boyfriend who seems physically incapable of expressing their emotions or the over-sharer that just never stops talking about their feelings. There's the compulsive-liar relationship that we all seem to go through, where you just may never find out if they were ever telling you the truth. You have the friend that you never, and I mean never, should have let out of the friend-zone. There are more shades of crazy than I can list here in this article, and I'm sure that most of us could go through that like a checklist.
But what makes a relationship truly healthy? And how does someone who has never experienced it realize that what they have is good and true? Most of us who are finally experiencing something genuine and real after relationships that were plagued with drama are always watching and waiting for the other shoe to drop. We wait for this person to have some fatal flaw. We wait for the aggressive and overbearing traits to appear. We wait for them to be uncontrollably jealous so that we can have our "AHA!" moment. It may never even occur to us that we finally have someone who only cares about your happiness. We've found our matching piece.
With them, it clicks. Things that were always so difficult in past relationships are now easier than ever. You don't feel burdened with problems. You no longer fear that you can't make them happy because you now know that you can. In a small argument when he tells you that you're a bad driver, you can't even be mad because you just look at him and laugh. You know that you're in a healthy relationship when you look into his eyes and see nothing but pure and unconditional love. When you're making pancakes barefoot in the kitchen, pajamas on and messy hair going everywhere, and he still looks at you like you're the most beautiful girl he's ever seen. Even when someone hits on you in front of him, where your other ex-boyfriend would get upset, he just laughs because he knows he has no reason to be insecure.
Love that comes easy. Trust that comes easy. Loyalty that's unquestionable. This is what a relationship should be. This is what the foundation should be composed of. You should always be with someone who respects your time and energy. Someone who is willing to put in the time to build something with you. You should feel at ease because you have someone who respects you just as much as you respect them. A true partner will tell you the truth about how they're feeling and what they think even if it's a little hurtful because they know they can't lie to you. Lies should be out of the question altogether. Honesty is valued and respected, and you know you can tell them anything. Finding your perfect partner may take some time, and you may even need to go through a few more relationships like this before you find your Prince Charming, but you will find him.
Relationships in the beginning take time. They will take your energy, and you best believe that you need to put the effort in to make it work. Relationships take trust, and without trust you have nothing. So trust your gut, and love freely. Believe in this truly amazing guy and know that he only wants what's best for you and to make you happy.
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