It takes a special person to have the patience to date someone who simultaneously has a love affair with the gym and all things health related. You may find the following shockingly familiar, if so you've been blessed with health nut as your main squeeze. Or maybe a health nut is in your future. This is simply prep to understand what you're in for.
1. We will most likely get mad if you offer us sweets because we should be having an apple for "healthy sugars" rather getting it through dessert. This doesn't mean we won't eat it, health nuts have cravings too. But, this means if we do choose to eat it, it will always be on our minds and the guilt of eating that third cookie will resonate for weeks.
2. We will sometimes ditch Friday night plans to get a good sweat on because the gym is where our comfort zone lies and to be honest we'd rather be in spandex anyways. You can complain all you want but we will give every excuse not to go. No, this is not normal it's just who we are.
3. We will take a new workout shirt over any bouquet of flowers. Excuse the sass if we are let down by your thoughtful flower purchase. We just don't appreciate girly things as much as workout attire.
4. We usually won't shower in the mornings because at some point we will go to the gym and we will get sweaty so early showers are pointless. Sorry if mornings initially scare you, you'll get the hang of our schedule eventually.
5. We have no issues running errands looking completely hideous, sweaty and makeup-less due to the strenuous workout we just survived. It's not something we are embarrassed by, if anything it makes us prideful.
6. We will complain about being sore constantly, but it's the most rewarding feeling ever. So since you're our "plus one" just accept it and feel bad for us. This is the biggest compliment.
7. We will live in work out gear and feel the best in it. When our couple friends ask why we never dress up they must not be our real friends or they would just know "Shannon's always in those crazy workout outfits."
8. Meal prep is something we look forward to. Organizing a week of meals helps us feel like our life is somewhat in order. Also, let's face it, true health nuts are constantly hungry and shamelessly daydreaming about the next protein-packed meal we can get our hands on. We will discuss food with you ALOT.
9. We will pee twenty times a day due to the excessive water we're drinking. Just twenty minutes of cardio will burn roughly 20 ounces of water. This means we must drink 20 ounces prior to our workout, 10 ounces during, and 10 ounces post workout and every hour after that. Yes, this means frequent urination. (Sorry in advance.)
10. If you join us at the gym we may get into it due to the hardheadedness we possess and how protective we are of the workout routine we've done for the last few months. If you try to adjust what we do we will become upset and it may end in a fight. Don't take it personally.
11. We can literally turn anything into a workout. Yes, this means squatting while watching TV or bicep curls with anything heavy. It will seem weird to your significant other, but they'll eventually find it endearing
12. We will get a plate full of protein when out on a date. No, it's not because of a diet, it's because we literally could eat straight protein and still not feel like we've had enough.
13. When others ask what we do and our response is "I really enjoy exercising and fitness" and then proceed to ask if there's anything else we like. Nope, it's pretty simple. And it means more to us than most cars do to men, so don't ridicule it.
14. We apologize if your stuck behind us on campus. If you see us walking extremely slowly we are not in a deep conversation. We just completed leg day and it's absolutely paralyzing to walk a few yards.
15. We will try our damnedest to encourage just about anyone to try to live a healthy lifestyle based on all the life benefits it has brought us. This means you will mainly get the brunt of this effort because we care about you. Soak it up, you mean the world to us and we want you around for a long, long time.
In the end we may be an interesting breed to choose as your significant other, but the good qualities we posses outweigh the bad ones. We will encourage you, feed you and always keep your best interest in mind, because after all that's what health is. We may be a little hard to handle, but we're worth it in the long run.