This year you need to fall in love, become overwhelmingly head-over-heels, irreversibly in love. Love comes through learning and at times pure determination. With the pressures of society to fall in love with the next guy you see – every single joke on Instagram, or dramatic post on Facebook- make the bold decision to fall in love with yourself, with the day to day, with the trials of 2016, and with every adventure that comes your way. Here’s why you need to fall in love first and foremost with yourself:
1. You are only you that will ever be and the only you the world will ever see.
Sometimes I forget that I’m stuck with myself for life (as crazy as that might sound). I always imagine that in five, ten, thirty years I’ll be drastically different. Yet, I know that journey will be slow and probably unnoticeable to me. Just like between elementary school and high school when you are suddenly twice your height. You’re going to change, but if you don’t accept who you are at this moment – your sense of humor, your faults, what brings you joys- when can you ever learn to love yourself along the slow, unnoticeable journey towards change? When will you realize that you are already a rock star, sensei, THE coolest thing since sliced bread?
2. You fall in love with Kendall Jenner, Channing Tatum, Justin Beiber, Adele, and hundreds of other celebrities you’ve never met.
Think about that. I am absolutely in love with Adele. Her music, her humor, her laugh, and her life enthrall me. Yet, I have never met her and me most likely never will. I know her through her music, through the emotions and life she has shared with every song. If she can share herself with the world, don’t you think it’s time to share yourself, well, with yourself?
3. Your flaws need loving too.
It’s not like a flower where if you just ignore them you die. It’s more like a weed where if you ignore it, it grows worse in the back corner of the yard (or our mind). For me, one of my biggest weeds was my scar from scoliosis. It’s 18 inches long and covers the span of my entire back – impossible to cover in a swimsuit. I’ve spent years covering it with my hair, with jackets, wearing dresses that don’t show my back and never stopped to pull out the weed always ignoring it. Yet, now I know that the scar may be weird to others, but it is who I am. It represents the 8 hours I spent in surgery, the four units of blood, the 64 screws, the 9 days in the hospital, and the year of recovery. Something that monumental in life should never lead to shame, it should lead to a story. Part of loving yourself implies that you have learned to embrace if not love your story. While parts may have sucked, they helped you reach where you are now, they helped you meet people, make decisions, and do things you’d never have done.
4. Don’t you want to look in the mirror without hesitation or judgment?
Don’t you want to see your freckles, your crooked nose, your chubby cheeks, and say, “Hey I am model material.” The biggest step to realizing that is knowing that it is who behind the camera that makes the decision. If you let Megan Fox stand behind the lens, Cosmopolitan magazine, or even the girls you pass every day, they are certain to screw up the picture. YOU have to be the one to take control of the camera, to capture every moment of your story. You need to be proud of every laugh wrinkle, worry crinkle, and sun freckle that you have. Because every day you model. When you walk down the street you model your self-worth either by holding your head high or avoiding all eye contact. When you walk into a room you model your story laughing at every joke or letting bitterness take the reins. When you come home at night, you model for your friends, for your family, the success you’ve had; whether it’s measurable in money or measurable in steps you’ve taken. So model the you that you are proud of, the you that you love, and the you that doesn’t hide her story.
5. This year, take the time for yourself. Don’t dress to impress others, dress for yourself.
Don’t fret about a blemish, accept it, and accept those of others. Pull your weeds, love yourself like you love Adele, and embrace the story that has created you. Fall madly in love with yourself and soon everyone else will to. For when a girl loves herself she does something bold, terrifying, yet thrilling and satisfying. Do what so many others want to do, but simply don’t; be yourself, and be happy with it!
