"He is my everything, happy anniversary!" "Mom, Dad he is everything to me."
I honestly could not tell you how often I have seen these phrases on social media websites, television, and in real life. It has become normalized for young women to think the one who they need to seek guidance and comfort from is their significant other. I would even go so far as to say their significant other is where their validation and self-worth lay. Today, I write this with even myself in mind of these mistakes of these lies I have let myself believe. On my own, I felt like my worth was not enough, I had to place my faith in something bigger in myself so I choose relationships. Through this past year and especially these past couple of weeks, I realized that mindset was a set up for disappointment and heartbreak.
God's foundation has been what has kept me sturdy. Have you ever had one of those days where you are ready for it to end because the events of the day progressively get worse? That has been my past two weeks. Stress, anxiety, work, school, financial instability have weighed down on my shoulders because I have only allowed myself to bear that pain. It is almost laughable that I felt the Lord of the entire universe could let alone not understand but could not possibly understand the "solution." I know this might be silly to you but I found amusing one of the definitions for solution on Merriam Webster was "a bringing or coming to an end or into a state of discontinuity." A solution is not what I begin to crave as much as I crave God's guidance and wisdom. When a solution is wanted, sometimes it is not the outcome that God wanted in your life. This is often where the mistake is made in believing a significant other can be there to fix your problem, they will give you the answer you are seeking/wanting.
I am not all saying they cannot be there to support you and encourage you but your everything and your hardships cannot be burdened only on their shoulders. They will disappoint you. Point and final. Staying in God's word and seeking a "real relationship" will honestly be the piece that completes you. He will love you with a steadfast love that will not be broken. The crazy thing I have begun to realize is that before you even seek his guidance for the trials and tribulations in your life, he is victorious. A verse that keeps coming into my mind for these chaotic past couple of weeks...
Romans 15:5 I am the vine you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
In him you can find happiness and fulfillment that no matter how amazing or important another early person is could not give to you no matter how hard they tried. The hardest part is remaining in him for happiness. Similar to a friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, etc communication is key in this relationship. Remaining in him through word and prayer is what has kept me spiritually and emotionally healthy.