As far as my memories go back, there has always been my sister. We are seventeen months apart. I was not even a year-an-a-half old when she was born. Most memories before age three are not remembered when the individual is older because of childhood amnesia. So for me, my sister has literally always been around. Having a sibling so close in age has ups and downs, especially since we are sisters.
When we were younger, everyone would ask my parents if me and Leeann, my sister, were twins. People sometimes still ask if we are twins. If they don't ask that, then the ask if we are sisters or tell us that they can definitely tell that we are related.
For most of my life, I felt like nothing I ever did was my own, because Leeann would undoubtedly want to copy me. We both donated hair to Locks of Love together. I joined show choir, she joined show choir. I dressed a certain way, she dressed the same. I played a sport, she played the same one. I felt that I could not escape her. I felt like I could not be an individual. Little did I know that these feelings would develop into an unbreakable bond.
Leeann and I would and still do almost everything together. I have friends, one in particular, who always says our names together because she said it just sounds right. Casey AND Leeann. I feel like we were and are seen as a package deal. You get one, you get us both.We have shared a room for close to twenty years, we have been at the same school as each other most of our lives, we have most of the same friends. These cause us to be extremely close, but have also caused quite a bit of trouble in our relationship.
Sharing a room with someone can get pretty cramped, especially after our younger sister was born and moved in with us. Three girls in one room, just imagine. There is the constant, "stop wearing my clothes" argument, and since we are so close in age we pretty much wear the same size in everything except pants. We were also used to seeing each other every day that whenever one of us would be gone without the other it was like a long lost reunion, but no doubt it would soon after be followed by an argument of some sort. We would argue about friends and clothes and space. Just about anything you could possibly think of, we argued about. Sometimes it would even become physical.
Leeann has told me before that she felt that she was living in my shadow, I felt I had to be the perfect one because I was the first girl. I felt I had all of these expectations on me to do everything right, while Leeann got to get away with anything and everything she did wrong. Little did I know she felt the pressure too. I was beginning to realize we were more alike than I knew.
Leaving for college was really different. I no longer saw her everyday. I no longer shared a room with her. We no longer shared clothes and shoes. We no longer argued about stupid things. I was glad to be gone, to have my own space, to finally have the opportunity to be Casey without Leeann. I didn't think I would be that missed, but my first trip home I realized I could not be more wrong. I was attacked. There is no better way to describe it. I was not even out of the car yet before my family was running out of the house, and guess who was leading them.
This summer was even more different, as I was eight hours away from home and I couldn't come home whenever I wanted. I would either call, text or video chat with Leeann everyday that I was gone. I trusted her with stuff I never thought I would have, in say, middle school.
Since I have been gone from home, our relationship has only gotten better. I think all it really needed was a little breathing room. Now we twin on purpose. We do everything together, on purpose. We go on sister dates. We spend as much tie together as possible when I am home. We went from being people who could hardly stand being around each other to being two people you have to pry apart when we are together. Sometimes we still get into arguments and don't like each other, but she is pretty much my best friend. Sometimes I hate her, and sometimes I love her, but she will always be my sister.