The Harm In Mistaking Attraction For Affection | The Odyssey Online
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The Harm In Mistaking Attraction For Affection

Attraction fades.

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The Harm In Mistaking Attraction For Affection
Katherine Blanner

Aesthetically pleasing people are great. We've all seen them. There's the Ryan Goslings and Angelina Jolies in this world just about everywhere you look. Attraction to another person is a real thing. However, the unfortunate mistake that many people make is the mistake of misunderstanding the difference between attraction and affection.

Don't get me wrong, I have certainly been attracted to people, as I'm sure we all have. However, the unfortunate thing that I continually forget is that attraction does not equate to affection. Youth has provided us a great many benefits. Of course, just as time winds forward, youth fades. There have been instances in which I have a crush on an individual that I find attractive. However, the attraction that I feel to them is not necessarily affection, as it leaves out a lot of exactly what makes up the individual.

Physical attraction to someone does not account for their intelligence, their life, their loves, and the fundamental nature of what comprises them. I have been thinking a lot about relationships, love, and the ways in which humans interact and communicate with one another on a specific level. I have come to the realization that it is simple and easier to appreciate someone for the benefits of their nature or of their youth, but it is less easy to understand and appreciate someone for the factors of their environment that they can readily change.

The difference between attraction and affection is stark. Just as love and lust are polar opposites, affection and attraction are as well. In the early stages of relationships, especially in young love, physical attractiveness can be some of the reason a couple is attracted to one another. However, when that fades, there is not always solid common ground upon which a relationship is built.

Physical attractiveness is not something that someone can or cannot help. Sure, there are plenty of industries where being visually pleasing is a required part of the profession, like modeling. However, being that physical attractiveness is something that one cannot help, and something that will inevitably fade, it is important to choose a partner that pleases your intellect. Maybe find someone with a similar underlying hobby, a similar religion, or perhaps a similar field of study. Finding a significant other based on the attractiveness of their mind, or the attractiveness of their individuality, is significantly more important than someone who has a simple level of physical attractiveness towards you.

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