Understanding the vast difference between doing something because you have to and doing something because you love to, is a lesson we must all discover. I myself have done some mass amounts of soul searching very recently, and have come to my senses on numerous decisions. I think as part of becoming an adult we all begin to lose ourselves in the, "have" to dos and forget all about the "love" to dos. I blame ninety percent of the stress we all build on this alone. So its time for a journey of self-analysis everyone, and to find some outlets in which you truly love.

I believe in a sense, balance is what creates true happiness. Though we all have a constant desire to get done whatever deem needed, you have to find a healthy stabilzer in every point in life. Not just as a normal escape, but in work life, friendships, and relationships. Finding a channel in which you can truly examine and understand yourself as a person is vital. I have mine in many elements; writing, dance, event planning, travel...honestly the list goes on. I may not use all of them as frequently as I may enjoy (or some in basically forever), but I know its my eye opener when things get rough to always look for something that makes me, me. I know it seems simple and easy enough, yet honestly as humans we don't think about ourselves as often as we should. I know...shocker, that is not at what you were expecting me to say. I know there is a lot of down talk about millennials and how different generations have become. I agree with a large portion of those thoughts, however we all have to be selfish in some sense. If you don't think about your own happiness enough or take the time to find it, this can and will create depression, or worsen so.

I can't stress enough how taking a moment once a day to have some you time could tremendously help with whatever you have going on in life. If its something often attainable for that matter; like cooking a new recipe or reading a book, then go for it, as often as you can. If traveling or music sets you free, try to make a commitment to go somewhere new or attend a concert a couple times a year, it can be something simple even, but I can promise you at the end of the day you will feel more at ease knowing you were able to partake in something unique to your happiness and not just those around you.

I personally struggled with my ability to achieve happiness for years, and still do sometimes today. It won't always be easy to find it, and yourself for that matter, but its a work in progress and a step in the right direction. If you don't personally have an outlet that you find yourself smiling while implementing yet, then get out there are trying something new, there is something for everyone. (Note: I didn't say someone for everyone, please find your own happiness. It's not an inside job, don't assign anyone that much power over your life.) Maybe its not something, it's somewhere that has you empty. I know you can feel completely trapped in the most open of situations, I have been there. Look into a new career path, something that will make you want to wake up everyday and love your job. Look into a new city, a new state, maybe even opportunities to work abroad; there is a place where happiness will reside for you. Or if you're like me you need to allow your home to be wherever you may go next, ever changing.

I know it seems counter productive to take advice from someone who also suffers from acute depression, but I have my fair amount of happiness to share with the world as well. So take my advice just search; search for your soul, search for your happiness, search for your outlet, search for you. Find those things that make you tick, and run with them, run with them until stress seems impossible and everything in life is bliss. Its not done in a day, its not done in a year, but you will get there, many others already have. Make an excuse to take time for yourself any chance you get, the only way to achieve real happiness is by locating it yourself.

I have seen it in the purest and realist of forms. I have seen someone battle with the strongest hate of life that one could ever begin to imagine, and after some time and scary moments passed, he began to understand why he was who he was, and it was seen in his art. Something he had let go for so many years as he battled his own scars, was what actually brought some light back to him. This person is one of my best friends and I see the passion in what he does more and more everyday in every sense, even when I am not physically there. And that's the thing about finding yourself, it radiates.

It's not just a adaptation people around you notice, but most importantly, you will. You will have a new way you see and handle everything. The darker things will seem much brighter, or will at least have a meaning that will be easier to comprehend. You won't turn to blame in others for things in your relationships, you will better understand yourself and what you can do to change the situation. Rather it be to help fix, or alleviate by letting go. No matter what roller coaster drop comes your way next, you'll be far more prepared if you are self aware.