I bet you think this will be all about weird things that happen in the bathroom, but let me clear that up right now — it's not. It is about the pleasure (and I use this term in the loose sense of the word) of living in Jester East, fifth floor, room 581.

Background: I am a current freshman who made a very big mistake when picking her room; unfortunately, I picked a handicap room.

1. We have two peepholes

Yes, both my roommate and I can simultaneously look out of the peepholes and spy on the people making all the racket in the hallway; however, our bulletin board is smaller than everyone else's to accommodate for this.

2. The bathroom is one-way soundproof

Whoever is on the inside can hear everything the people in the suite are saying, but not the other way around. Let me tell you, feelings have been hurt this way. In addition, if a disabled person were to fall in the bathroom, no one on the outside would be able to hear.

3. The shower floods our room

I understand why the ground is flat, but don't you think there should be some precautions in place to avoid flooding and leakage?

4. Apparently, handicap rooms are not granted the privilege of counter space

Unlike every other room in the hallway, we do not get a counter. Why? I do not know. There is definitely space for it. Instead, we had to DIY our counters by buying drawers at Walmart.

5. Speaking of DIY...

To avoid the shower flooding our room, we created our own wall. It's made of cut up binders, LOTS of tape and command strips. It really adds a feeling of "god, I hate my life" into the air.

6. For some reason, the handicap rooms here are denied stalls?

Why? Literally, in regular bathrooms handicap stall are the biggest. However, in these bathrooms the toilet is shielded by a curtain making it nearly impossible (or extremely awkward) for more than one person to be in the bathroom at a time.

7. We have one sink

Everyone else has two since there are four people using the bathroom...no, not us.

8. Moving on to the room...

You'd think living in a handicap room would be amazing because of all of the extra space, but it's definitely not.

9. There are random pipes that seem to be leading nowhere

I cannot explain this any better. There are random pipes running through my room.

10. Bed shakers, plug-in phone and fire alarms

To be quick, the bed shaker is just an outlet we can't use. We don't own a plug-in phone but it makes sounds. The fire alarm makes us go both blind and deaf during drills.

11. Our closets are soooo weird

Our closets are split in half by a random shelf. This makes almost all of our clothes wrinkly and gives us less storage space.

12. It wasn't labeled on the housing portal

I feel like at the bare minimum there should have been a label letting us know what we were getting into.

13. Why is it on the fifth floor???

Who's idea was it to put a handicap accessible room on the fifth floor? How do they get out during a fire? The elevators aren't even usable.

BASICALLY, CHOOSE YOUR ROOM CAREFULLY AND DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT, PICK JESTER EAST FIFTH FLOOR ROOM 581!!!!! (Or 579.....theirs is WAY worse.)