Last week my brother texted me asking if I had seen my wife's Instagram story. I, of course, hadn't and proposed to ask her what it was. She then, after a long sigh, emitted emotions ranging from disbelief to anger to frustration to sadness.
"After what Tristan and Jordyn (I think that is how you spell her name) did, this just leaves all of us wondering what will happen. Like, how's Kloe going to handle it? Like, why Jordyn?" or something like that.
So, yes, I was now in the fore-front of this whole Kardashian conspiracy and controversy, and as I furiously dug to the bottom of it (with a man's perspective), I came to one conclusion: They probably all had a wrong in it, somewhere. This, of course, did not appease my wife (nor will it probably appease that hordes of women who are either Team Kloe or Team Jordyn? If that's what they are called?).
But at the end of the day, it led me to an all-too familiar thought that has bounced inside my mind for a while: Why do girls get (most of) the rap for being the one who cheated/fooled-around/got caught, etc.? Why is Jordyn getting (mostly) blamed for this whole ordeal, and not Tristan? (Oh my gosh, I can't believe I'm writing these words and not preparing for Turkey season)
Now, before tackling and examining a debate where sides could get heated, I must confess: I am no feminist. At all. I'm all for equal rights and fighting for women's rights, but in my opinion, most of the war has been won. I believe in the Biblical Model for Marriage (Christ to Husband to Wife to Kids, Wife submits and respects while Husband loves unconditionally, but both are Equals, etc.) which has caused many a controversy before. And, I do believe that a lot of women's own problems and division comes from other women, not men (Have you seen a Bravo TV Housewives show??).
That being said, excluding a marital affair (which almost always gets the husband blamed more), it seems that women in general get more of the negative responses and reactions involved in anything sexual... way more than men. Consider the following questions:
Why are females (in general) who sleep around considered whores, but males who do are "cool" for lack of better words?
Why do females who date/talk to multiple guys get looked down on, but when males do it it's "living the life" for lack of better words?
Why are females (in general) who lose their virginity before marriage looked down upon with ridicule and shame, when males who lose it before marriage treat it as a "right of passage?"
And there are so many more I could ask.
We cannot chalk this up to "boys being boys" or some other lame excuse. Yes, boys will be stupid and break things and hurt others (who hasn't hurt others while growing up?). But treating a woman with respect and seeing her as more than a physical body, but a soul whom was created and is loved by God is what we are aiming for. That's called being a Man.
I'm not offering a thesis or plan to fix this backwards thinking. All I can say is that we all need to treat each other equally and respectfully, as well as recognizing that, when we mess up, that's exactly what we did, no matter the gender.