It was freshman year in high school when I first heard the term "talking." I was listening to a senior girl gush that she was currently "talking" to this "super hunky guy!"
I, naive, having never kissed a boy before, completely misunderstood this term of "talking." I believed talking was just the Webster's Dictionary definition of talking meaning a literal conversation, and considering this "super hunky guy" was nowhere close to the vicinity of this current conversation, I was confused. Very confused.
So here is a guide to the stages leading up to actually have a boyfriend/girlfriend for all of you that are/were as naive as I was, or for those of you who are just plain confused.
Texting
This is the first stage. This has taken the place of going out on actual dates, because this is how you get to know one another. You most likely text every day, but not all the time, because who wants to sound needy and desperate? You are allowed to be "texting" multiple people at once and it is not considered cheating.
Texting can lead to talking...
Talking
When two people are not exclusive with each other nor have established what they are as a couple, but they do have some sort of relationship. Basically you could be going on dates, and by definition are possibly NOT exclusive, yet if you are "talking" to another person, that would be considered cheating.
Talking can lead to becoming A Thing...
A Thing
When two people like each other, and they're going on dates with only each other and no one else. It is considered promiscuous to have "A Thing" with more than one person, however, "A Thing" does NOT mean you are dating.
A thing leads to Practically Dating...
Practically Dating
You have now been "A thing" for an extended period of time. All your friends consider you and your significant other to be together, however, you do not have the official title. It is definitely not acceptable to be "Practically Dating" two people at once. However, you are not official yet, so technically, you both could end your relationship at any time with the same amount of drama as an actual break up! Although you can avoid the dreaded "(Insert your name here) changed their relationship status to single" message.
Practically dating will eventually lead to Officially Dating...
Officially Dating
Here it is, folks; what you have been waiting for! You are finally Official. I am talking Facebook, tell your aunt, send Grandma pictures official. It has been a long time coming but you now have a BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND!
"(Insert your name here) has changed their relationship status to In a relationship."
Congratulations.
By now, I truly hope you have caught on to my sarcasm.
This is our culture now, the culture of texting and tweeting and stalking your crush. There are no real dates with potential suitors, and if a boy takes a girl out, he better not take another girl out the next weekend. In our society, the minute you say you like someone, all of a sudden, you aren't allowed to like anyone else.
You may ask why it is so bad to be faithful to one person?
If you believe what I believe, you are dating to marry. If you go out on just one date and you are not allowed to keep your interests open to other boys/girls, that truly limits the interaction you could potentially have with your future husband or wife.
I am in no way advocating being unfaithful; I am doing the exact opposite.
I am stating that going out on real dates without having to fully commit to "talking" or "a thing" in order to find the heart behind the person you could potentially spend a large portion of your life with would benefit everyone in the long run. Our generation has distorted the idea of what dating is, and maybe, if we could get back to the original definition, there would be a lot fewer broken hearts.
If you truly know the person you are going on dates with and have invested in a relationship with them before they become your girlfriend/boyfriend, then that eventual, committed relationship is so much more likely to flourish in a way that not only benefits those involved, but protects the hearts of the men and women God created in his image in order to glorify him.
