Giving is an important component in renewing the relationships we cherish in our day-to-day. That’s why gift-giving is considered a primary love language (along with physical touch, quality time, words of affirmations, and acts of service). We often depend on our ability to give to others to express our love for them. Sometimes we even receive gifts as affirmation of the love others have for us. Some consider it moral to give freely even to strangers who seem to be in need.

Aside from the necessity of giving in belief systems and in mutually beneficial relationships, people are designed to get satisfaction out of being a pleasure to others. Just as giving can create warm, sentimental moments, giving can also leave you feeling depleted if you do it in an unhealthy manner. Maintaining a healthy balance is of the utmost importance. Here are some ways to preserve the very heart from which you give.

1. Give Freely
2. Don’t Give Out of Lack, Give Out of Overflow
3. Give Diversely

Do you ever see those salty Facebook posts that say things like, “Don’t swim across a rivers for people who wouldn’t jump in a puddle for you” or “Don’t give the world to someone who wouldn’t give you a turd?” I feel like those aren’t the best examples, but you get it—these statements imply that giving is a two-way street rather than an expression that flows out of the abundance of someone’s character. People don’t mind giving freely to people who obviously can’t reciprocate, but often expect a return from those who can. This kind of thinking overlooks the transformative power out of unconditional love. The spirit of giving is more about sharing of yourself—why not share some of your genuine generosity with someone who isn’t there yet? What a great opportunity to show them how it’s done.

God makes us all the responsibility of managing our souls, which are made up of our emotions, thoughts, and choices. In order to manage our souls, we have to set boundaries for ourselves. That means not feeling pressure to address every need that confronts us. Everything isn’t yours to address. Unless your name is Jesus, you’re simply not equipped. Not many people incorporate the first step of successful giving, which is to receive. How can you give even the basics—forgiveness, acceptance, unconditional love—with out having those demonstrated to you first? I have the most to offer when I’ve taken the time to feel affirmed in the perfect love of God first. If I’m giving outside of that place of abundance, then I find myself giving, instead, out of a perceived lack of acceptance and love. And that’s not cool. You don’t have to earn those things.

If you haven’t really noticed, this article hasn’t really been about the giving of material objects. I guess, because I am a college student, I can’t really relate to loaning out anything of more value than a packet of instant oatmeal. But that’s one of the lessons I’ve enjoyed learning most during this time of financial deficit: I have a diverse array of ways to express my love and solid relationships that couldn’t possibly have to do with my money. You have to know that you have intangible things that the people are in need of. I feel very loved when my friends help me with my math homework. You can give of your time and your service. If you need an essay edited, I got you. People need grace and forgiveness everyday. I know I do. I’ll take that! A lot of people in this world are without a smile, which is definitely something you can afford.

Here’s one from me:

:D

…You’re welcome!