To My High School Guidance Counselor,
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Do you remember me? I’m the girl who walked into your office one day senior year confident that I was going to conquer this big, bad world one day. I’m the same girl who walked out of your office on that very same day, tears streaming down my face, feeling as though I was never going to succeed in life.
Five years later, I still remember what happened pretty vividly. Since I can only imagine that you’ve done this with other students throughout your career, I highly doubt you remember it. I excitedly handed you the paperwork on the five colleges I applied to, and told me that I wasted my time filling out those applications. To you, I’d never get into any of the colleges I hand picked to apply to. I wasn’t good enough for college past a basic community college. “Do you really think you’d get into a school as selective and academically challenging as St. John’s University? Here’s an application to Dutchess Community College, you’re better off just forgetting about those schools and focusing on attending here in the fall.” And even when I walked back into your office months later with all five acceptance letters in my hand, you still told me I’d be wasting my money on schooling I’d never complete because I wasn’t ”cut out for the college life.”
You made me feel low, worthless, and unsuccessful. I felt stupid. You were supposed to be the person giving me practical advice and encouragement, but instead you made me feel as though I shouldn’t even try to succeed. Leaving your office that day, I honestly considered dropping out of high school. What was the point if this woman who was supposed to be all-knowing about everything college related didn’t believe I’d be able to go to college?
I look back on that day and think, “wow, how did one person with such strong, negative words manage to upset me so badly? How does anyone, let alone a guidance counselor who barely met me, think they have the right to tear my hopes and dreams to shreds right in front of my eyes within a short twenty minute meeting?” But mainly, I wonder how you still have your job completely intact at my alma mater all of these years later.
When you’re chosen for a position like yours with the responsibility to guide young students in the right direction, the goal should be to give students more confidence about college and life ahead, not less. Discouraging these scared, confused, and anxious students about their aspirations is not part of the job description. Guidance counselors are supposed to guide their students towards success, not tell them there’s no way for the success they want to be a reality.
When I came into your office two years later, as a graduate of high school about to start my sophomore year of college, my younger brother by my side, I bet you weren’t expecting what I had to say. I believed it then and I believe it wholeheartedly now: I could easily do your job a million times better than you, and one day I’m going to do it. Whether or not you believe that’s going to be true, the only thing that matters is that I know that it’s going to be true.
Five years later, I’m a year away from receiving my bachelor's degree. I always think that it’s ironic that the school I’m getting that degree from is the same one you told me way back when not to even apply to, and I believed you at first. But I’m getting that degree. I’ll have it my hands in less than one year, hanging on my wall. And not long after that, I’ll have a master's and Ph.D to hang up right next to it.
So please; the next time you tell a student not to bother applying to college, remember my story. Remember that despite every horrible, negative and inappropriate thing you said to me about my future, I’m achieving my goals anyways.
Sincerely, The Successful Girl You Said Would Never Succeed.
