Exactly a year ago on June 23rd, 2016, my trembling legs took me across the stage so I could receive my high school diploma. With my decorated cap clutched in one hand and my diploma in the other, I looked around and realized that this would be the last time I would see some familiar faces I had known for all of my life. Armed with support from my family and friends, I went on the academic journey that so many other bright-eyed students had taken before and was thrust into my freshman year of college.
While my freshman year was certainly an action-packed one, I managed to come out relatively unscathed and am looking forward to starting my sophomore year. However, in light of one of my best friends graduating high school on this very day, I wanted to use my experiences to (hopefully) inspire and excite any incoming college freshman who thinks that they need to have everything all figured out. While I was only in your shoes a year ago, I understand the stress that this time can bring, and I want to ease this transition in any way that I can. One of the most important lessons I learned outside of the classroom this year is...
1. It’s okay to not love your college experience.
When all of your friends from home spend their winter break talking about how bored they are and how much they can’t wait to go back to school, it can feel a little lonely if you’re having a tough time on campus. While you may feel ostracized and anxious for a while, just know that it is perfectly normal to not completely love your college experience. Although I do attend a wonderful college, I naturally had difficulties getting adjusted to my new environment and workload. Finding a support system, whether it is close friends or counselors, can help you out tremendously during this transition.
2. It’s okay to ask for help.
In relation to having a support system, asking for help is something commendable and not to be feared. You personally may need academic help, help adjusting to college in general, help with bettering your mental health, or help with other issues. There is a common stigma about students who ask for assistance being considered “weak”, but I consider getting help, no matter what it is for, one of the bravest things you can do. I personally took this to heart by seeing a counselor on campus throughout my second semester of my freshman year. Looking back on it, I am proud of myself for taking the initiative and asking for help when I needed it the most.
3. Take time to give back to your community.
This may not even cross your mind; you have to worry about homework, meals, extracurriculars, and everything else that is crammed into your schedule. However, I took a course my freshman year where I got the incredible opportunity to volunteer once a week in the local area, and I can genuinely say that it changed my life. The stories I shared and the memories I made were all priceless, and I was able to change people's lives for the better! If you need help starting, investigate into whether your school has a service learning class as an option. You can also look at your school's page of clubs and activities to see if there are any volunteering options. If all else fails, you can even start a volunteering group of your own!
4. Take time as often as you can to reflect.
While daily reflection was something that initially took me a while to do, I managed to make it a habit and I am so glad that I began this journey. I personally journal every day, but there are a multitude of ways you can reflect based on your personal preferences, such as prayer, meditation, or other forms of writing like mine. The reason that I began daily reflection was that I was struggling to see my growth and progress throughout the academic year. However, reading my entries from January to today has made me realize that I have accomplished more than I ever thought I was capable of. Reflection is also something that can bring positivity and relaxation to your hectic college life.
5. Get outside your comfort zone.
This may sound cliché, but it is truly a stepping stone to your success at college. This can be done in many settings- in the classroom, in your dorm, on the stage, or anywhere that inspires you to do and learn more. I personally got out of my comfort zone this year by introducing myself to the girls who lived next door to me, publishing my poetry in my school’s literary magazine (even after some of it was criticized), and applying to be a tutor in my school’s Writing Center. If I had not done these things, I would not have made some of my best friends to this day, and I would not have had the wonderful opportunities that I have heading into sophomore year. I know this might sound scary to some, but it is much better to regret trying something new than to regret missing out on something.
6. Make time for people back home...
During college, it can be difficult to stay in contact with old friends and even your family because everyone is so busy. For some students, setting up a designated time each week to talk to family members has worked wonders; it all depends on your personal schedule. It may not seem as easy as that to talk to your old friends, but making an effort to reach out to them is always appreciated. Even just a simple "Hey, how are you?" can lead to conversations that you never thought you would be having. While this may seem like common sense, I have seen plenty of relationships drift apart because one or both members are "too busy". I know that it always brightens my day to see a random text from an old friend (and I can only hope that I can do the same for them), so you never know- your friends could really appreciate your effort!
7. ...But don’t get hung up on lost relationships.
Unfortunately, some relationships do fade no matter how much effort you put into maintaining them. Instead of mourning over who you may have lost, try appreciating the people that you do have in your life! This is something that I am trying to work on as well, and I am able to recognize the wonderful, steadfast friends who have chosen to stay by my side. Again, going out of your comfort zone can help you make plenty of new friends if that is proving to be a difficulty for you.
8. Focus on the positive.
This last point combines the previous points of taking time to reflect and asking for help. One way that I choose to do this is at the end of each day, I write down anything good that occurred to me. Some of my consistent ones during my freshman year included lunch with friends, a heartwarming moment from service, or a funny moment from chapel choir. This is a surefire way to make you smile because "every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day".
Good luck to all of the incoming college freshmen as you begin your next milestone! For all of you that I know personally, I have nothing but the utmost faith in all of you and I am so excited to see what you all accomplish. These tips may sound cliché to you, but they are some tricks I really could have used coming into college. Whether you follow any of this advice or not, I'll always be here for you and I hope you have a wonderful introduction to college!