Growing up Greek is quite the experience. You're forced to deal with your annoying relatives on a daily basis, bathe in olive oil, and suffer from daily food babies, but you wouldn't have it any other way.
1. Walking around the house barefoot means you’ll get sick.
2. Your mom heavily believes in the curse of the evil eye.
And even if you think it’s a bunch of malakies, you’ll still wear cute necklaces and bracelets with the evil eye on them.
3. Everyone is a malaka.
4. You went to Greek School and hated it.
But when you meet a Greek person who doesn’t speak Greek, you’re suddenly glad you went.
5. Your mom’s favorite disciplinary tools included a Chinese slipper, a wooden spoon, and a clothing hanger.
6.You talk with your hands.
7. Your mom won’t stop talking about finding you an eligible bachelor even though you just turned 13.
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8. The iconic "when I was your age we didn't have that" speech.![]()
9. You ran away every time your mom was on the phone with distant relatives from Greece.
10. You weren’t allowed to leave the house with wet hair.
11. Every year, you routinely explain to your friends the difference between regular Easter and Greek Easter.
And yes, we actually crack the eggs!
12. Your papou waters his concrete.![]()
13. All of your friends think you're loud and don’t understand why until they meet your family.
14. Being spat on is a blessing.
15. John Stamos is the love of yours and all your cousins’ lives.
16. You have at least one religious icon in your house, even if you’re not religious.
And let's face it, every Greek person is religious, even if they're not.
17. Your mom asks a million questions every time you leave the house.
18. You need to mentally prepare your non-Greek significant other before they meet your family.
Life Hack: When your mom makes a comment about the fact that he is not Greek and he asks you what she said, just lie and say she thinks he's handsome.
19. Your mom has to go everywhere she’s invited and your whole family has to go with her.
20. You "open" or "close" the light.
21. "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" is so accurate it’s scary.
22. No one could pronounce your name.
My name is Kyriaki and people used to call me “Teriyaki” as a child.
23. OLIVE OIL.
A key ingredient to everything. It's like the coconut oil of the Greek household.
24. You can never have too much oregano on your food.
25. Your addiction to caffeine started with frappes.
You probably rolled your tongue on the R when you read that, too.
26. You know it's a party when money is carelessly being thrown all over the floor and a drunk guy is on his knees clapping while another drunk guy is dancing by himself with his arms out to the side.
I feel this on a spiritual level.
27. The annual Greek festival in your town marks the most important time of the year.
And for your mom, it's the perfect place to find you a husband!
28. Food is a way of bringing people together.
And every time you eat with your family, it's a feast that's not worth missing.
