The summer after I graduated high school lasted forever. It didn't help that fall term at the University of Oregon doesn't start until late September. All I could do was spend time with friends and family, search for a first job, work after acquiring said job, and twiddle my thumbs dreaming of my first year of college. Of course, I was nervous, but for the duration of my break, it was overshadowed by my excitement to take the next big step in my life.
College orientation came and went, which only made the nervous feelings more prominent. It wasn't until the night of my 19th birthday when I fully realized what I was about to get into and I broke down crying. All I could think about was how my childhood, though it was spectacular thanks to my amazing family and friends, was over and I would never again know its simplicity in the world of responsibilities and bills.
Remember how I said I got a job that summer? I am so thankful I had/have it because I think it was a great tool to introduce this new chapter of my life. After the initial meeting of the season and working my first day, I felt tired yet accomplished. However, by the time I clocked out of a 12-hour shift the next day, I was an emotional wreck from how tired and overwhelmed I was (to answer your question, yes, crying is a recurring theme in this transition).
I know what you may be thinking, "Pshh, I've worked a (insert a shift longer than 12 hours here) shift, and then I had to (insert other responsibilities here) right after! What are you complaining about?"
Cool, you work very hard and I applaud your efforts to support yourself (and possibly others); it's a hard thing to do and I admire you. However, please keep in mind that this was my first job, and therefore, my first time being exposed to that amount of labor especially since I had worked a seven-plus hour shift the day before. My body was allowed to feel tired after working more than it was used to. After continuing working in that job, I got used to the work and I didn't feel nearly as tired after a shift anymore.
Fast forward a few weeks to when dorm move-in day had finally arrived. I was distracted for most of the event by decorating my room which was something I was very excited about. However, after I hugged my family goodbye and watched them drive away while I was stuck there, the waterworks turned on again and I spent most of the welcome events feeling small and alone despite hitting it off with my roommate pretty quickly.
As the school year went by, I had several instances in which I would be overwhelmed with all my responsibilities, missing home (even though I live only about an hour away from my school and I was able to visit often), and even feeling a bit jealous of younger friends at my high school who still got to participate in my two extracurriculars.
For those of you reading this article who are about to start their first year of college, I apologize if I'm freaking you out. The thing about college is that it's probably going to be different from anything else you've done before with both ups and downs. I've always been a diligent student and have taken advanced courses, but I still had academic struggles this year despite completing it with a pretty good GPA. As for the social aspect, it definitely had its fair share of awkwardness and strife, but I've made a bunch of amazing friends who support me on my worst days.
As you enter this transition from Hell, my biggest piece of advice to you is to build up a support system away from home. I won't lie to you - it's going to be hard and there will be times in which all you want to do is crawl into bed and watch old YouTube videos that make you feel nostalgic. Life is easier with friends. Chances are most of them don't know what they're doing either. Make mistakes and take the time you need to be sad, but also remember to learn from them and laugh about them later on (writing for Odyssey has proven to be a great outlet for me to do this! *wink wink*). Lastly, use your treasured childhood memories to remind yourself they made you who you are today.
The past is great to look back on, but your future is bright and just waiting for you to discover it.
