"Did you notice who wasn't in church this Sunday?"
"Oh I heard who she was with last night.."
"You know what they say about him."
Living in the Bible Belt entitles you to a certain social confinement and a constant state of walking on pins and needles. One wrong word or action and your reputation is tarnished. It's a region divided by saints and sinners only, where gossip is small talk and peers are spectators.
Growing up in a small southern baptist town, I knew these rules all too well: go to church and stay out of trouble. I never dreamed of being a rebellious kid. I wanted to do well for myself, serve the Lord and create a future I enjoyed and made my parents proud. I closed off a lot of ideas that I thought might not be "acceptable" to others. You had to protect the music you listened to, movies you watched, people you socialized with and image you carried. While respecting yourself and others is greatly important, this seemed more of checking off a list of dos and don'ts, while confining life to a box. I put my potential, purpose, and worse yet, God, in a box.
I developed the "God only loves me when I'm perfect" mentality and it was exhausting. Religion will tell you that God's word is a doctrine that condemns you to Hell if you sin. Relationship with God will tell you that God's word is a guidebook on how to take on and get the most out of this life until you join him in Heaven. God will always meet you where you are. I can't imagine my parents raising and loving me only until I did something wrong then casting me out. Just like a parent, God wants the best for you. He lights the path for us to keep us away from the wrong turns that will later hurt us, not to ridicule us when we make a wrong decision. When I stepped away from the religion of the Bible Belt, I was able to grasp this truth.
"But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loves us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ — by grace you have been saved." Ephesians 2:4-5
The Bible Belt has a hard time with judgement. Many people are turned off from Christianity because they assume it's a congregation of hypocrites who point fingers for fun. I've met many people who say, "I don't go to church because I don't want to judged." Truth is, non-believers, church-goers and pastors alike all sin. We sin because we are human and could never be perfect. Instead of pulling each other apart because we sin differently, we are called to be encouragers. The best thing I ever did was join a small group for girls who were facing trials similar to mine. In it I found acceptance, accountability and freedom. Church is meant to be a place where we come together with our differences and imperfections for God and not for ourselves. The judgement happens when we close the church doors to only the people who "seem holy and perfect" instead of keeping them open for all. John Gray once said, "The church is like a hospital. What is the need for a hospital if the sick aren't coming in."
In such a conservative region as the Bible Belt, a lot of strife can arise in division of opinions and morals. Today's social mentalities are all at a juxtaposition on multiple different ideologies. People are commonly either: gay or straight, pro-life or pro-choice, for gender change or not, pro-gun rights or against, etc. (Those could be an entirely different article altogether.) In the Bible Belt I would constantly be surrounded by people who had their opinion and were enemies with anyone who thought differently. While I have my set of beliefs that I stick to, who am I to judge anyone? While I might not agree, I still love. Church of the Highlands has a simple but powerful motto: Love God. Love People. How easy and effective is this? Sometimes, well more like oftentimes, my sister and I will not get along or agree. We can argue about a situation for hours and get no where. Or, we can agree to disagree, explore each other's side, and come to a middle-ground.
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Matthew 7:1-2
Again, while I may not agree with every concept in the Bible Belt, I still love those in it. If I could say anything to those who still think in the ways I use to it would be this: "Learn to love more like Jesus did." His whole life He was surrounded by people who agreed and disagreed with Him, did and didn't believe in them, and loved and hated Him. He treated them all the same. He loved them despite their differences and imperfections. If I'm judged of anything, I want it to be of being like Jesus.