When I was much younger — almost too young to decipher whether this memory was part of a dream or real — I was sitting in the back of a church between my mother and my aunt. I think we were attending my great grandmother’s funeral.

I sat quietly, probably not too sure of exactly what was going on, and looked over at my mom. She was crying but trying to be discrete, and I looked at my aunt as tears started to collect in her eyes.

They looked directly at each other and kind of chuckled. I assumed it was sisterly mocking at one another for crying in public. One leaned into the other and whispered in an attempt at a British accent, “She’s not dead yet!”

They began giggling a little too loud for a church, and definitely too loud for a funeral.

This went on for what seemed like a long time as they sniffled, giggled and cried tears that were probably caused more by the laughter than sadness.

I think other people were staring, which only made them laugh harder and continue to toss Monty Python quotes and references back and forth.

Many people might see this reaction to death as morbid or inappropriate, and others may be able to relate.

Recently, there have been many reasons to cry and mourn, one of those reasons being the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School shooting that left 17 people dead.

This shooting felt all too familiar, yet the aftermath did not take its usual path into the forgotten void of gun and mental illness debates that constantly follow these horrific events.

The Parkland students used their grief and anger as a flame to spark a nationwide movement calling for stricter gun laws and extensive background checks.

Whether you agree or disagree with gun reform is not important to this particular conversation. This is not about guns and who is at fault, but about the fact that these high school kids witnessed and survived an intensely traumatic experience.

This shooting, like the hundreds before, has left a permanent stamp of pain on young people that should be focusing on homework and college applications, not saying goodbye to their fellow classmates, teachers, coaches and friends at 17 funerals.

As these teenagers have been fighting hard and loud for an actual change, they have also been ridiculed for their emotional reactions.

A clip of a few students smiling, laughing and taking selfies before going on the Ellen DeGeneres show has circulated the news world and social media platforms.

The kids were being harshly judged for being happy when they supposedly should be grieving.

Many of us have never gone through a school shooting, or any other major trauma like these students have gone through before they even start their adult lives.

And those who have had to go through anything traumatic, or even those of us who have had to face the mourning process after a significant loss in our lives, will know that there is not one correct way to grieve.

Grief comes in endless forms, and how people react to upsetting circumstances and life-altering trauma is not black and white.

There is no standard protocol for expressing strong emotion and the fact that these teenagers have responded to this massacre with such a strong and motivated attitude to make change really happen while they feel the after-effects of surviving a real-life horror proves that.

Many students and teachers may be experiencing symptoms of PTSD and others are probably feeling every emotion at once, which can be confusing and painful.

While these kids navigate through normal changes and the pressure of looming adulthood, they now must also learn how to process through the stages of grief.

There may only be five stages of grief, but there are infinite ways in which a person may progress through the stages and what emotions they may feel in the process.

If you are really going to judge some kids for being human beings and taking on a lot of responsibility, thus changing the way our entire country reacts to mass shootings, then you really need to do some deep self-reflecting.

Please, look at every perspective and realize that teenagers are allowed to laugh after tragedy and still feel sadness.

Sometimes, the best way to deal with pain is to laugh or smile through it, not as a way to hide your true emotions, but because having a strong support system of friends and family is still allowed to be fun.

Robin Williams as Patch Adams once said, “What’s wrong with death sir? What are we so mortally afraid of? Why can’t we treat death with a certain amount of humanity and dignity, and decency, and God forbid, maybe even humor.”

What would you do if you survived possibly the most terrifying experience of your life, started a nationwide debate that has made an impact, convinced large companies and the government to demand change and were invited to speak with Ellen DeGeneres, all before you graduated high school?

Would you think you weren't allowed to crack a smile, feel excited about your future and cry with your friends all at the same time?

Everything about this situation and this issue is heartbreaking and inspiring at the same time, so why are we expecting those feeling pain from loss to have only one reaction?

I am so glad I remember — or dreamt — that day with my mom and aunt.

When I think about one of the first times I experienced the loss of a loved one, I realize that I should cry when I feel like crying and laugh even if it isn’t the “right” time.

Let these teenagers mourn in their own way because you do not know when you may have to face loss and grief. I certainly hope that no one ever faces this kind of trauma, but either way, I hope you feel what you are meant to feel and express those emotions in a way that is right for you.

When I remember those in my life that I have lost, I instantly remember the best parts of that person and find myself smiling over a silly memory.

I use humor to cope with loss, so I may laugh at a funeral, too.

These students experienced terror and loss. We have seen them cry and express anger, and they are allowed to laugh together if that’s how they feel like expressing themselves.