There was a brief moment of silence within my grief in which I suddenly and quietly let go of attachment to everything in my life but my relationships.
My dad had been more than just a father. He was my best friend and my rock. No matter what happened in my life, he gave me strength - from the first time I got strep throat, to the first time my heart broke. Living without him completely redefined me. I lost all interest in creating things. I just struggled to get through each day. The only things that mattered to me were my family and my friends.
From that darkness, I began to blossom.
Slowly, my inspiration returns to me. I’m full of ideas - of stories I need to tell. I find the motivation to pursue those things that matter most to me. The slate of my life has been wiped clean and a new foundation of grief calls to me, reminding me to live life to the fullest each day. For the first time in my life I find myself writing on a regular basis. I’m exploring all of the creative outlets I was once too fatigued to pursue. I crave adventure above all else. I revel in the feeling of fighting through anxiety.
Losing my father has pushed me to be the best person I can be - so that I can prove I hold all of his stories and lessons dearly to my heart... so that I may honor his memory by living the life he’d want me to have. Losing my dad was one of the hardest moments of my life, but it has pushed me to fight for the brightest future I can obtain.
I am still filled with sadness of his passing, but I combat my grief through accomplishments that honor his memory.