All little girls at some point in their lives want to grow up to be like a Disney princess. They want to be adored, to be beautiful, to find their prince charming, and to live happily ever after. Somehow, with the helping hand of a few others, I made a left turn and grew up to be Maleficent.
1. I trusted and was betrayed.
When I was young, I was warm and had so much love to give. I believed strongly in love and saw beauty in the world. I gave my trust to someone I thought I could give it to, only to them it betray me. I figuratively lost my wings just as Maleficent physically lost hers. Her wings being a symbol of her innocence and trust, they were taken from her abruptly by a young man she loved and trusted.
Damn, does that sound familiar.
2. I was not the first choice.
Stefan, who would later become king and the father of Princess Aurora, betrayed Maleficent by burning off her wings with iron to gain rights to the vacant throne. One selfish act forever changed everything.
I couldn't even begin to count the times something else was put before me. It's never easy to come to terms with knowing someone you loved placed an object or title above you. It's probably even harder to know they left you behind and moved on like you were nothing at all to them, even when they said nothing like that would ever happen.
My heart was broken.
Disney's 2014 “Maleficent”really got me in the feels when I started to see myself within her character. Maleficent was told that what she and Stefan had was "true love" and that he wouldn't do anything to hurt her. He even sealed the deal with the "true love's kiss.” Then once he saw a chance at the throne, something he wanted, he threw her heart to the side like it meant nothing. He had taken everything she had from her for his own gain and then went off to marry another woman, thus, breaking Maleficent's heart again.
Seeing that unfold in theaters broke my heart because I had just gone through a just as nasty ordeal. What had happened made me so cold and jaded and I can totally understand why Maleficent went off the deep end, because let’s be honest. I would have too.
3. I let my anger get the best of me.
Everything that happened left me feeling incomplete. I was so angry and I let it get the best of me and in the end, my own doing destroyed me further.
I took my anger toward the ones who harmed me on others who didn't deserve it..and when it was too late, the damage was already done.
However.
4. In the end, I had one true friend.
So it wasn't all bad. Out of the whole ordeal, I lost everyone except the one who would literally stand by my side through it all. Oh you know who you are, my own personal Diaval. You forever have my respect and a piece of my heart. You were my dragon when I needed the protection, my raven when I needed to be lifted up, my wolf when I felt alone. There is nothing I could do to ever repay what you did for me, or say to explain how much you mean to me.
5. And eventually, I wound up finding myself again.
Nothing will never be the same, but I found myself again. My innocence and trust can never be fully restored, but I'm working on it. I've also discovered that real love does exist after all. My wounds just needed healing and my hear just needed time to warm up again. My moors are gradually becoming greener.