I remember a very odd question my Korean friend once asked me.
"Julia," she said late one night as we lingered talking before bed, "What does it mean, 'how are you?' How do I respond when someone says this?"
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How do you respond? I wondered internally. Isn't it obvious? It means HOW ARE YOU.
What was obvious to me, because I grew up hearing it, was not to her. So I explained that "how are you" meant a lot of things such as hello, I acknowledge you, and tell me something that is new with you.
I didn't fully understand my friend's confusion until I experienced it for myself in the England. My first day at University was full of people asking me, "Are you alright?" But it sounded more like, "Y'all Riot," in the thick Yorkshire accent.
Well, yes, of course, I'm alright. Do I look not alright? Do I look lost or confused? I wondered inside.
After weeks of this question, I began to realize it was similar to "hello" or "how are you." There came a point where I had to ask one of my British friends how I should respond when someone asked me if I was alright.
Greetings are interesting and appear very bizarre to people in a different context or setting. My friend from East Africa laughs when she sees people talk about the weather.
While in her country it is very common to ask about family members and work or school, no one talks about the weather because it doesn't change all that often.
In the Midwest, the weather is unpredictable. It's the only place I know where you can experience all four seasons in the same day. While the sun rises behind thick rainy clouds, by afternoon there could be a torrential downpour that turns to feathery snowflakes that melt with the break of a warm vibrant sun. And then the day finishes with a purple sky and bees drifting through fuzzy dandelions.
In the face of such wonky weather conditions, it is only normal to speak of it while greeting people. But it may seem rather odd to people who have never done so before. My friend Katherine from Columbia says the weather doesn't change that much where she is from. Two days that are months apart will look quite the same. So to talk about the change in the weather would probably not come up in day-to-day conversation. My African friend says she always laughs when she asks someone how they are doing and they immediate start talking about the weather.
Her response is, "What is this? It's so strange ... I'm asking about you ... not the weather ... If I want to know how the weather is I will ask the clouds ... I'm saying HOW ARE YOU."
One culture's norms can be another culture's comedy.
