I grew up reading books and having books read to me, mostly just A Bug's Life, but that's another story for another time. Books have always brought me pleasure by allowing me a moment to escape my own life for an hour (or six) and enter into another life through my favorite character. Books are therapeutic for me and sometimes, the good ones teach me some really great lessons about life, love, friendship, and everything in between. Lately, I've been glued to the beautiful white, crisp pages of Emily Ley's, Grace Not Perfection: Embracing Simplicity, Celebrating Joy. This book, as simply written as it is, is jam packed full of God, love, family, relationships, and self-love and I can't help but smile brighter with every turning page.
I'll be honest here, I usually go for the young adult books that require little-to-no brain power to read but are, nevertheless, still enjoyable. But, this book .... this book is different. This book urges me to think. To think about me and how I'm sharing of myself to any and everyone around me. To think about my relationships and whether I'm feeding myself before I try to feed them. To reflect on what brings me joy and why I'm not doing more of that stuff. Mostly, this book has reminded me just how precious I am to be a child of God - a child of the God who dispels grace and mercy on me like an ever-flowing waterfall. Grace that reminds me that 'perfect' is me just as I am. I wasn't created to be perfect but nonetheless, I was made to be perfectly loved by a perfect God.
If I haven't won you over yet with Ley's book, let me reveal some of my favorite lessons learned from this beautifully crafted gift from God.
1. Feed yourself or else you won't be able to feed others.
You see, it is a beautiful thing to pour into others. It is a beautiful thing to have your life fulfilled by helping others. But, there's no beauty in running yourself ragged trying to take care of other people before you take care of yourself. You can't be your best self as a mom, a wife, a girlfriend, a friend, a daughter, or a student if you're choosing to neglect yourself for the sake of others. Take care of yourself. Feed yourself (literally and metaphorically). Pamper yourself with that homemade spa date. Go to dinner by yourself without the kids or your grumpy husband. Get in that Bible every morning when you have fifteen minutes before the kids have created their own hand-crafted circus. FEED. YOURSELF.
2. Prioritize your time and make yourself a top priority.
You know that planner that you bought but never really use - yeah, get that bad boy out and dust it off! Pencil in your day-to-day routine. Spend five minutes thinking about your day and how you want to spend time with God, your family, and yourself (remember, don't neglect yourself). Pencil in fifteen minutes in the morning to drink that cup of coffee and read a devotional and if you can, add another fifteen minutes before bed to take a long hot shower to wash away the day. Seriously, love yourself and love the time you've been given in a day. No moment is a waste because it has been given to you by God!
3. Show yourself some grace.
Holy moly - if we're not the hardest critics on ourselves, I seriously don't know who is. Maybe Judge Judy or something, but seriously. Why are you being so hard on yourself, day after day?
My favorite, favorite, favorite verse is Romans 5:8 - "God demonstrated His own love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Talk about grace, people!
You see, we try so hard to be perfect or to be the right this or that. We want to be the best and we want to other people to believe we have it all together when really, sometimes, we're falling to pieces on the inside. You don't have to be anybody for anyone. You don't have to be someone you're not. You're not fooling God (and His opinion is truly the one you should care about the most). He sees you - like, He sees you ... when no one else does, when you're crying in your dark closet, or when you've been cut off in traffic and all you want to do is throw your hands up and leave the car right there. He sees you and in those moments, he shows you grace and love. He loves you just how you are and just where you're at. Appreciate that and remember that you were saved and redeemed by a God who believed you were worth everything - including His own son. Show yourself some grace, give yourself a proverbial pat on the back, and love yourself right where you're at.
4. Take time to embrace the things that bring you joy.
A good cup of coffee, the Book of Romans, porch talks until 3 AM, laughter - big belly laughter, makeup and cute clothes, writing, jamming out in my non-tinted-windowed car, eating pizza way too late at night, buying a new planner ... these are a few of the simple things in my life that bring me complete and utter joy. Joy is often found most in the small things.
Are you too busy looking for the big picture that you forget to see all the small pieces coming together to create your masterpiece?
Society has a way of making you think that if you slow down to admire an awesome sunset or if you sit on the beach for an entire afternoon, that you're wasting time that could be better spent elsewhere. But, that's the problem with a society that's not aligned with Christ. Christ has taught me to enjoy everything as if it were a gift and believe it or not, your life is, in fact, a gift. Take the time to think about the things that truly bring you joy. Think about the things that make you feel most like you and most alive and then do more of that stuff.
5. You have your whole life to worry about your whole life. Breathe.
Stop worrying about the future and what will or won't happen. Stop worrying about what tomorrow brings because the Word says in Matthew 6:34 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with dreaming about the future but don't become anxious about what is to come. Trust in the One who sees your whole life laid out in front of Him and is walking with you with every step of the way. Worry about today and how you can make today the best today it can be. You have your whole life to live - live it well and let the pieces fall exactly how they're meant to.
6. Remember to say thanks and remind yourself of the gifts you've been blessed with.
I truly believe that when we exchange our complaints for prayers of thanksgiving, we see our life shift in a dramatic way. I do my best to be positive and to surround myself with positive people because life is hard but things could always be worse and it's nice to be reminded of the fact that not every day of life may be good but there is something good in every day. When you're having a bad day, instead of muttering those words of aggravation - thank the Lord for waking you up to live another day with those annoyances that remind you to shed grace on those around you. The people and situations in your life were given to you as a gift - they were meant to bless you (and others) and fulfill you. You are blessed beyond belief - find the beauty in that and thank the One who loved you enough to bless you with this beautifully chaotic life.