If you’re an avid reader of my articles, I would like to begin this one by saying two things: one, thank you for being a supporter of what Samantha Stoddart writes on a weekly basis; and two, you may be surprised by what this article is about.
A little less than a year ago, I wrote an article entitled, Is Your College Right For You? I wrote it with the intent that it would be a guide for college students who were thinking about transferring. Not surprisingly, the inspiration for this article was me.
I had struggled for a long time deciding on whether or not I wanted to transfer Universities. Was the environment right for me? Was I too far away from home? Was the education I was receiving the best I could get? After weeks of going back and forth, I finally came to the conclusion that I was not going to transfer.
Thus, it may come as a shock to you that I am writing this article about how I am transferring to a different University, and why I believe that saying the word “goodbye” doesn’t have to be as serious as we make it out to be.
Upon telling my friends on campus that I made the decision to leave, they were incredibly supportive. I can honestly say that I received the best reaction possible from them, and this made me even more confident that we would stay in touch during my transition. However, I couldn’t get the idea of actually having to say goodbye out of my head. It seemed so finite, so for sure, that I debated even saying it in the first place.
Still, after giving it a little more consideration, I have devised a few simple strategies that I believe can be applicable to anyone who is making a big transition and is worried about the act of saying goodbye.
To begin with, don’t make it a bigger deal than it actually is. Regardless of whether or not you’re transferring to a different University, or even moving states for a job transfer, your true friends will always keep in touch no matter what. As long as you have a phone, or a pen and a piece of paper, you will be able to stay in touch with them, so just remember that this goodbye is certainly not forever.
Branching off of that, you have to remember that making an effort is the most important thing in a situation like this. Although it may be easy to say, “yes of course we will talk all the time!” it’s going to be much more difficult once you actually make the change and find that you and your friends new lives might not synch up as well as they used to. If this is the case, don’t panic! There will always be time in the day, or even the week, to communicate with them, but it all stems from how much effort the two of you are willing to put in. You may not be able to have hour-long conversations about what’s new in your lives, but sometimes, just an occasionally “hey, just wanted you to know I’ve been thinking about you” will do the trick.
Lastly, remember that as long as you have access to a plane, train, or car, the distance that may seem far away on paper won’t be that bad in reality. I understand that money is something we all need to focus on and that it isn’t easy for everyone to spend money on a plane ticket flying halfway across the country, but remember that’s not the only option! Generally, there are going to be buses and trains that are much less expensive that are able to take you to where you need to go, and on the off chance that you are uncomfortable with public transportation and have a car of your own, drive out! It may seem like a long, endless journey, but if you’re making it for the one’s you love, it’s worth it.
Overall, remember that just because you say “goodbye” doesn’t mean it has to be a goodbye for good. We often over analyze this word as a definitive comment made by us and those around us, that causes us to believe it means we may lose touch forever.
Bottom line, things are never as bad as they seem in the moment. Once you take a little time to decompress and give consideration to the situation at large, you may surprise yourself at how much more manageable things seem.