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Goodbye 2017

This year changed my life.

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Goodbye 2017
Josh Bednar

2017-- it was interesting to say the least. Honestly, it was one of my down years. It wasn’t awful, but if I were to rate from a 1-10 scale, it would be receiving a solid 5. While 2017 met me with multiple struggles and issues that were many times out of my control and unbeatable, it was not the worst I have ever had. (2014 will always hold the honor of being the worst in my entire life, so nothing is going to beat that.)

The first half of 2017 got off to a decent start. I came into the year very motivated to make it better than the last. My 2016 kind of fell apart during the last month, but I survived and claimed that 2017 would be my year. I was wrong. While the year seemed to be going okay for a couple of weeks, many of the problems that plagued the end of the previous year came rushing back. The problem was, I pushed a lot of those issues under the rug and acted like they would solve themselves, and obviously they didn’t. I had to solve those problems myself and figure out what was best for me.

I did figure out what was best for me. I acted on it and did what I needed to do. Through that I discovered who my actual friends were and was able to get rid of the snakes and toxic people in my life. While that decision would ultimately make me happier in the long run, the short run was hard to deal with. Here’s an example of how I felt. There is a scene in an older Disney movie called Treasure Planet. It’s a flashback where the main character is only a kid and he wakes up one morning to see his dad walking away from their house and onto a ship with all his belongings. He runs down the stairs to find his mother crying with her head down. He runs desperately to catch up to his dad, but his dad reaches the ship and it takes off, leaving him reaching out towards the ship as it pulls away. He would never see his dad again. Well in my situation, I was the main character, the mom weeping was my heart, and the dad was my life slipping past me faster than I could catch up. I truly felt like I was losing control of everything I had. My life at the time felt like it wasn’t mine anymore, and if I didn’t do my absolute best to get it back, it would ruin me forever.

Many other things would happen in 2017-- some good, many bad. I would experience an all too familiar feeling of heartbreak all over again in the month of April, but I can’t go there because I could write a novel and we don’t have enough time in this article. All I can say is that I didn’t take an opportunity when I had one, and that door closed quickly. In May, things reached their peak as far as good things went. Finally, something went right for me and it felt amazing. The summer would come and go with mostly good experiences and memories (despite going to Kennywood 5 freaking times.)

The last major thing would once again be unfortunately something I didn’t want. I gave up on a passion I had since 4th grade. In November I said goodbye to drumming. While that was an extremely hard thing to do, it felt like the only thing to do at the time. Well just a few days ago I made a decision; I’m not ready for it to end. I found something that inspired me to the point of reconsidering. On top of various other things, this really pushed me over the edge: “'It's impossible,' said pride. 'It's risky,' said experience. 'It's pointless,' said reason. 'Give it a try,' whispered the heart.”

My mind, my pride, my body all want to be done. My heart doesn’t. If there’s one thing 2017 taught me, it's always listen to your heart, regardless of what it says. With all this said, I’m planning on trying out for drum corps in 2018 for the 2019 season. I’m going to need some luck and a whole lot of support, but my heart wants to make this work. I haven’t drummed seriously/corps style in almost two years, so I have some practicing to do if I want to ever hope to get back to the level I was at spring of senior year. Maybe with many hours of practice, some things going my way, and my drummers in heaven Todd and Ryan watching over me, I can make this work. 2017 wasn’t a sophomore slump; it was a setup for the greatest comeback 2018 is going to see.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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