Usually, people look forward to their birthday, especially in their younger years. However, I don’t how excited I am to turn 19. Obviously, I’m excited for it to be my special day and for it to be more festive than an average day. However, I don’t know if I’m ready to let being 18 go or if I’m ready to be one step closer to adulthood.

I can’t even express how much I’ve grown and changed as a person in this past year. I have experienced, gained, and lost so much in this past year and it has all made me a stronger person. I have learned so many life lessons as an 18-year-old. I learned to do what makes me happy and have no regrets. I learned that everything happens for a reason and that anything is possible. I learned that I could overcome anything even if it seems impossible.

This past year holds so many crazy memories that I will never forget. In this past year, I experienced things that I never thought I would. This was the year of making so many new friendships, this was my first year of college, this was the year of so many “firsts”, this was the year of dealing with losing a pet for the first time, this was the year of heartbreak, and this was my first year living away from home. It was in this past year that I really became comfortable with myself and who I am.

Also, turning 19 means being a whole year closer to becoming an actual adult. I don’t know if I’m ready to face the reality that I’m not a kid anymore. If I could just be a teenager forever that would be perfect. It’s crazy to think that as a 19-year-old I will be applying for Hofstra's early graduate program. It’s sad to think that my childhood is really, truly coming to an end.

This past year means more to me than anyone will ever truly know. The thought of not being 18 anymore makes me so upset. I know that I won’t be losing the memories and I know that being 19 doesn’t change who I am. But still, it is sad that this year is coming to end since it means so much to me. And while I’m terrified to have just one year left as a teenager, I hope being 19 treats me as well as being 18 treated me.