I have done some of the most self-contemplation I’ve done in a while. I have gathered advice from people I know in an attempt to relate to them and see how I can move forward with myself now that I have a degree. I lack a map of my own for any sort of soul searching, so I thought the advice of friends and family would work as a rough GPS to steer myself. And you know what? I’ve been doing it all wrong. While it has been immensely helpful and beneficial to hear what my interviewees have had to say, comparing myself to them—and their future plans for themselves—ultimately leaves me feeling like a bush league player trying to play with the pros (excuse the cliche). I can digest and contemplate the notes I took for each interview all day long, but when it comes down to it, it doesn’t change how I feel on the inside about all of this.

Last night, I realized I cause myself more stress and dissatisfaction about life by thinking about what I should be doing. While my job is stressful and I really hate the weeks where I live paycheck to paycheck, I know in my heart that I am content to be a coffee jockey and to manage a small group of individuals I reluctantly admit I care about. I like seeing the small successes that come with working in a high-volume coffee shop. I like making drinks during rushes and people telling me I’m fast or that I make a damn good latte. And yes, I even like cleaning the grout on the floor (scrubbing vigorously is a hell of a way to get my day-to-day frustrations out in a productive way).

I know my parents, boyfriend, and others who want the best for me see the stress that my job comes with and how it affects me. But being on edge is my natural state. I could be a yoga instructor and I’m sure I would find something about it that stresses me out. I have felt pressured to move on to the next best thing, and that pressure makes me feel like what I’m doing just isn’t good enough. I am enough. What I’m doing right now is just fine. I might make a fraction of what I would make at a “real job,” but I at least have the benefits of working at a big girl job while still working in a coffee shop. I have a fat retirement fund and I’m only 24. I have stocks that are about to double at the end of the month. I am about to get two separate raises over the next six months. If I can get paid above minimum wage plus tips to clean drains or do latte art, then that’s not such a bad deal. If I am content right now, then I want to live in contentment because it won’t last forever. /end rant/

For my final interview, I interviewed a woman—a real, adult woman, with a family and a job that requires taking business trips. I was told to talk to her months ago, but, being me, I put it off longer and longer. When I talked to her over the phone last night, I wished I would have spoken to her sooner. She made me realize that it’s okay to be a barista and to just chill for now. It was so good to hear someone tell me that. Her biggest (and most valuable piece of advice) was to just enjoy life. Rather than present this is the same question and answer format I’ve done for the previous two articles, I’ll lay my notes out in paragraph form. As I talked to her, I found myself asking things I hadn’t written down, and the interview became more of a conversation than anything else.

***

I work in Portland for a HR consulting firm. My team makes recommendations for clients, like whether they should hire someone, make some layoffs, or otherwise. I studied politics because I loved it. I lived in Washington, D.C. at the time, and I realized it was expensive to live there if you aren’t a politician. I got a little jaded after being an intern, but I still finished my degree. I think it's important just to have a degree; it doesn’t matter what it is. It helps me to critically think.

The first job I got was an admin assistant through a temp agency. The COO asked me to talk to people that were in the processes of being hired to make sure they meet the bare minimum requirements for the job. I enjoyed it and the COO noticed and liked that I liked it. I started to have more responsibilities, like payroll, and working with more confidential reports. This expanded to actual HR issues since we actually started to have people. I started to learn on the fly. It’s not that I love HR, I love business, and I love helping companies make money. What’s cool about my current job is I’m in the HR world, but not really because I’m still in the business world, too. I measure our money and our metrics. It fell back where I was able to do more of what I enjoy rather than just HR. One thing that really stuck with me was how driven the COO was. She was 35 years old and still didn’t know what she wanted to do when she grew up. She was winging it in life. It blew my mind that she was willing to go with her gut. I’m an organizer and it was different seeing her look at things differently.

I was 22 and took the first offer that came up and didn’t see any point in changing that. I remember making $8 and thinking I was making the big bucks, but my parents thought I could do more since I had a degree. My job was in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, which was a half hour away from where I lived. They wanted me to find a job closer to home because it would save money on gas.

Smaller cities or large towns aren’t always a detriment for job hunters. These places have smaller businesses than what you might find in a big city. In a small business, they’re not going to pigeon hole you. If you prove to be smart and reliable, they will give you more responsibilities and experience. In a big company, you’re put in your own little box like everyone else. When you’re young, you kind of feel like you want to do what you want to do. You don’t want to be stuck in a box. A lot of smaller towns have small business, with about 50-100 employees.

I’m a big believer that life is short and as long as you can pay your bills and don’t have to rely on anyone else, then you can do what you want. I have family who only works enough to pay the bills, and while some people might think that’s no way to live, they make it work. They have so much free time to enjoy their lives and do things together, like hiking. They are happy together. People in Portland are so happy and so nice and so not judgmental. Living the corporate life may not be the way you’re wired, and you have to do what makes you happy. Some of us like our pensions and 401K and some people like having the free time to live life. You might end up working until the day you die, but you will have had the free time to really live. Some people will do it the other way, and live life on their retirement fund.

When it comes to going back to school, I’m not a big proponent of educating yourself to death just to do what you want. I’m not a creative individual, but what I would assume is that creative people are so talented naturally that it would be more about sending a piece of work, design, or writing to an employer rather than a degree because that piece of paper tells them nothing about who you are. Degrees are great and nice to see in the business world, but I’ve talked to some real dummies with degrees. The next person I’m interviewing is the first person in a while to blow me away and she doesn’t have a degree. I have a friend I’ve known since high school who is creative. He makes a living as an independent contractor and he submits these works to employers. He works from home, makes his own hours. The money isn’t always there and it can be a tough life but the independent side is really nice. He was working 9-5 and doing these side gigs and it turned around so he does this full time now. If you find out what you really want to do, then you should go back to school. I don’t recommend going back to school if you still don’t know what to do because it would just be a waste of time and money.

Do what you want to do. If you don’t have to rely on people, and you can pay your bills, this is the time to relax and enjoy life. You will have time to be an adult later on. When you’re young, you have the drive that kind of dies after thirty. Do stuff after work like tutoring or use your weekends to build that resume. Spend extra time doing creative stuff and submit it. Enjoy life.