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Godly Friendships

I am too valuable to have to forfeit who God created in order to forge friendships out of necessity.

Shelby

Jun 07, 2016

Oklahoma Baptist University

204

Shelby Cummins

I want true friendship — not just the titles and social media posts, but love-centered, Christ pleasing interactions with people who I genuinely care about and who genuinely care about me. I want to be able to hang out with someone without feeling out of place or inadequate. This feeling of inadequacy can be in terms of romantic interest or of social standing or of worldly gains. I am too valuable to have to forfeit who God created in order to forge friendships out of necessity. I am loved deeply by my Creator, my family and my church. That is enough.

When pursuing new friendships, I will pray fervently for the person. I will put both the interests of my heart and theirs at the forefront of any decisions made to get to know one another. If it is a boy, I will remember that he is being prepared for his wife by the same God who prepares me for my husband. I will trust His guidance and the discernment of my parents and mentors to guide my decisions. I will not make him uncomfortable or allow myself to be put in uncomfortable situations. I will strive to love like Christ — unconditionally, while also protecting my own heart. If it is a girl, I will treasure her for the person God has made. I will not judge based on appearance, background or any other worldly factors. I will cherish the time I spend with her in order to grow spiritually or to help her in her growth. If she isn't a believer or struggles with her faith, I will be patient and loving but protect my heart and soul from the lost tendencies in her heart. I will acknowledge that this sinful nature exists in me, but I will rejoice in and respect the amazing sacrifice given to rid my heart of darkness. I will love like Christ — unconditionally, while also protecting my own heart.

As a Godly friend, I will:
…be friendly to everyone.
…show grace to those still lost in sin.
…respect the decisions of parents, whether mine or theirs.
…reflect on my heart in a relationship.
…ask for feedback from mentors on my behavior, thoughts, etc.
…strive to please Jesus in every situation.
…be a light in a dark place.
…pray for those in my circles, whether I consider us close or not.
…love unconditionally while protecting my own heart.
…remember that the greatest friend is already enthralled with me and does everything for me to be His.

"Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony." - Colossians 3:12-14

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I am too valuable to have to forfeit who God created in order to forge friendships out of necessity.

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The struggles of having an RBF are all too real

1. People asking if you're mad at them.

2. Those people who hand out flyers don't always try to stop you.

3. Creepy guys telling you to smile.

4. "I thought you were a bitch when I first met you."

5. People telling you you'd be "so much prettier if you smiled."

6. Doing your makeup and looking great, which somehow intensifies the bitch face.

7. Regularly explaining "it's just my face."

We all go through certain stages when we have a crush, Tina just explains it better.

That moment that someone you never looked twice at suddenly makes you do a double take out of no where.

But you can't have a crush, that's outrageous. It's all in your head.

Because you don't have a crush, there's no reason to tell anyone about anything. Right?

But then they do something irresistible and you start to lose it.

Now accepting the fact you have a crush, you have to keep it under control.

Then there's the part where you tell your friends who will claim they called it.

They'll be excited and cheer you on. That's until they realize that your crush is all you'll be talking about.

Your obsession has become so bad, that your Facebook stalking is getting out of control.

But your friends will try and help move things along any way they can. That doesn't mean it will be any helpful though.

As time goes on, you start having fantasies about the two of you and it's starting to scare you a little.

You can't focus on anything because all your attention is on them and everything they do.

Anybody who comes near your crush is now an enemy, and you are willing to fight for your crush.

When you see them, you act like an idiot. Trying to hide your feelings may not be as discrete as you think.

Keeping your feelings inside will start to be harder and harder until you can't keep it inside anymore.

Who knows, maybe it will work out? Take a chance.

Everybody hurts sometimes.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

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4. You may feel a little down sometimes.

5. Fear of missing out won't be as real.

6. You are a college pro.

7. You'll have more free time.

8. You're happy you're still in school.

9. You feel like a guru.

10. You continue to grow.

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