Sometimes, more than often, I find myself running from things I cannot fix. I know that we serve a generous and thoughtful Savior, but it's easy to feel far from this understanding. Things in life throw constant roadblocks, and to defend ourselves we do the same in return with God. If we serve such a humble Savior, then why do we feel selfishness is the only way to get far in life?
When we do things for others, we find frequently that we come up short. We aren't receiving their best in return. The muffin you bought for your friend didn't even come with a thank you text. Yes, maybe she forgot.... but still. The guy who took you out last Friday has left you on read for the whole week. You even brought him lunch to his work.
In these moments I have made an overwhelming realization. In these moments where I felt "taken for granted" I used to suppose that surely it aligned very closely with how Jesus must have felt. That is where the beauty is.
He doesn't.
He views you as treasured as the one who is lost. He is willing to leave the 99 and attend to the needs of the one who needs him. In translation, he is willing to buy lunch for the person who has ignored his love for years. He would be thankful to be left on read by one of his lost sheep, just to know they are aware He is there.
Rather than feeling stupid or gullible when all types of relationships throw curves at us, it is better to walk knowing we have made a difference. Whether that be a relationship that needs to end or not, we know we have walked with a servants heart for the duration of it. Yes, it is bad for relationships to be one-sided.
Yes, your friends need to love you through stuff.... or they are not your real friends. BUT. It is imperative that we remember to not have an expectant heart but a thankful one. If we "expect" for goodness to come out of our deeds then are we really enjoying the true fulfillment of relationships? If everyone always threw attention and showered us with gifts, would we ever feel truly important to any specific person?
Real change comes with a change in perspective. Rather than viewing everything as a competition to gain someones attention, it is more fulfilling to see God lay out his plan. His plan might be for you to step away or to continue serving. What might seem like a waste of time to you, might be God using you to show His love.
In the song, "Reckless Love," something so powerful stands out to me.
"When I was Your foe, still Your love fought for me"
What would our life look like if we approached all of our relationships like this? What if when someone disagreed with us; we loved them through it instead of being combative? Although this does not apply to physically or emotionally toxic relationships; I think we could all agree that there are more than enough situations in where we could do this. No, no one can match the reckless love of God. No, it's not easy to love those who don't return the same feeling. No, it's not easy to forgive... ever. No, we can't ignore the requests of God.
I pray that we begin to listen more than we speak. I pray that God reveals to us his plan on how to witness for his glory. I pray that when God orders us to help him lead the lost sheep; that there is no shadow we wouldn't help light up for them. I pray that when people put up walls to hearing the love of Christ, that He gives us the strength to kick the wall down. I pray that we never lose sight of the mountains God would climb, just to know we are secure in His love.
I pray that when relationships fail us we remember that God placed us there for a purpose. I pray that the moments of feeling "let down" turn to peace and understanding as He reveals this purpose. I pray we give others the same grace that our Savior gave to us, selflessly and wholeheartedly.
So next time, if you don't receive a "thank you," just know that God is forever thankful for your love.
"And I couldn't earn it, I don't deserve it, still, You give yourself away"