Last month my pastor talked about the Tower of Babel. I, being a church kid, thought "I get it God was pissed and separated people cool." No, He talked about how God separated people out of their best interest. God wanted people to go forth instead of going inward.
He knew that once people try to go to their comfortable spaces they could not grow as people. As I left that sermon I realized I lived my life trying to build a fortress inward instead of spreading myself out into the unknown. Once you take that chance outside of your comfort zone is when you grow the most, move outward instead of inward.
I am a videographer. I loved video since I was a child; I use to force my brother to be in these crappy movies I made with this tiny plastic camera called Digital Blue. I also made my cousins act in plays that I directed and had my unwilling relatives watch our drawn out plays.
In high school, I joined the broadcast team, got discouraged, then joined a video class outside of my high school. After all of this, I decided it would be best to move inward and go with something comfortable, psychology.
After I got my degree I realized I was screwed and couldn't do anything with that degree- sorry psych majors, unless you want to go into counseling you cant do anything- I fell back into the thing that was a constant in my life, telling people's stories.
I was fortunate enough to land a job with a wonderful church and a rad boss doing videography. I use to tell my boss that they would have to drag me out of that place kicking and screaming. I loved being there, but it was also a comfortable place for me. I was afraid of rejection on several fronts so I build a fortress of comfort around me.
Well, these past few months provided major changes. I moved out on my own, got a dog, went through a breakup and then my church job told me that they could no longer afford the amount of hours I was working. My fortress was coming down. God came down and shook up the safe foundation around me. It was terrifying, but I had to move out.
I searched for jobs, worked toward healing my heart and tried to maintain my little home with my Kauffman. It has not been a pretty process. I've had to borrow money several times through tears of defeat.
Growing is a painful process, but it is a meaningful one. Last week I accepted a job with a company that does videography work that focuses on Kansas City, that I can wear jeans to and bring my dog, so basically it is a dream job for me. I've been working toward working outward in my life in several avenues and this has allowed me to grow.
Living in your tiny comfort zone will not bring happiness. This is defiantly the dumb cliche thing you've read on Pinterest, but it is true. When you try to build inward you will never grow. Building a fortress around you will only keep you safe, but there will be no satisfaction in that.
On my last day at the church, my incredible boss looked at me and said, "you are about to grow so much." She laid that confidence in me to go after my dreams, but she knew that I needed to expand out to grow. You must take a chance to grow outward.
