If you were to watch a chick-flick or read a romance novel, you would see your basic story about a guy and a girl who fall in love under somewhat strange circumstances. Along the way, something ugly usually causes the beloved couple to split up for a bit, and then they get back together in the end with one, long, romantic smooch. All ends well. We then talk about how great it was and how we wish a guy would love us like he loved her and such.

One thing that I have picked up on in many romance movies as well as books is that the girl is usually broken in some type of way. She has a bad past which can make her hard to love. This makes the guy love her more because she has some air of mystery about her. He loves her despite her hard life and insecurities, which is how it should be, if we are being honest. Or the roles are reversed and we end up wanting the bad guy. We think because of these wonderful movies and books, that we can love them until they change. Of course, we know this to not be true, but we may still want to try it just in case it this rule makes an exception because you're in love.

Don't get me wrong. Love covers a multitude of wrongs, as the Bible says. But this is not the issue. The issue is that we end up glorifying this idea of having hearts with tall walls that need to be broken. One Direction even has a song that basically tells girls that being insecure makes them beautiful. It doesn't. Confidence is beautiful. Insecurity hangs like a dark cloud over you. Know your worth and you'll never have to worry about what others think. You won't have to thank people for "putting up" with you because real friends don't "put up" with you. They love you and celebrate you.

I know as Christians, we can compare our testimonies to those who were abused, were addicted to drugs, etc and think that our testimony of, "I grew up in the church, but I still didn't know God until I got save at seven," doesn't sound like much. We end up glorifying the people with the troubled past, as if we weren't in just as much need of redemption as they were. The fact of the matter is this –– we are all in need of redemption. God did not go to extra lengths for some. He died for all.

I know for me, sometimes I have found myself almost wishing that I had some type complicated back story to my salvation. In the end, it's not all that complicated. I grew up in church, got saved when I was about 10, started suffering from depression that lasted up until I was 18, rededicated my life at 15, and now I am stepping into the calling God has placed on my life, which has been quite the adventure so far. Am I hard to love? Not really. Is my past complicated? I guess you could say it was. But everyone has their own battle to face, and depression was mine. Because of it, I have to be more careful than most people to make sure my thoughts aren't going haywire and overtaking my mind, but I will never return to it. I will glorify Jesus because He delivered me from it. I won't go around making sure everyone knows that I had depression. I will make sure people know that He is able to rescue you from anything that threatens to overwhelm you.

There are people that have, for sure, faced stuff that some people couldn't even begin to imagine. There are also those who have faced what we might call "minor" battles. They are all battles nonetheless. They still have the ability to overwhelm us. We can't look at the people with the complicated past and insecurities who still gets the guy as someone to look up to. We can't keep chasing the guy with the wounded past hoping that we can fix him. I suffered with depression and insecurity and it was awful. I never want to go through that again and I never want to put someone else through that.

When I realized who I was in Christ, I was set free from both, and now the joy of the Lord floods my soul. People who have known me for years can see the difference. Ladies, people will notice confidence and joy, so wear it like a crown. If you've suffered in your past, don't settle for anyone who treats you less because of that. Wait for someone who will love all of you and want to help you overcome those struggles. Find friends who will help pull you from darkness and into the light of Christ.