I've read so many articles.

I have turned to so many news sources.

I've stayed up late at night watching YouTube videos from other countries showing me how bad it is and how bad it could get.

I have read all the sad Facebook posts and even wrote a few.

I've called friends crying, and sat through family dinners that were spent talking about what our world may crumble to.

As I'm sure you could probably imagine-none of this helped me. In fact, it made my anxiety worse than it ever has been before. The one thing I failed to do from the beginning-that I promised myself I would not go another day without-is praying.

You see, this pandemic is scary. We all know that, and if we don't, there are a million outlets in the world reminding us. The thing is, NONE of those outlets can tell us anything that God doesn't already know. Why trust more in the news than we do our God? God literally has already seen the end to this pandemic. If we can trust enough in him, and give our anxiety, worries, and fears over to him, it's doing more for us than any "informative" outlet can provide us with.

I understand not everyone has faith, and though I truly support anyone's beliefs and decisions they make in life, I can not begin to tell you how beneficial life has been since I started to confine in God and give the burdens I face daily to him. Just saying it out loud and feeling the presence of someone listening is comfort in itself. When I tell God that I KNOW he will show our world peace after the virus, I believe it. When I pray to protect the people I love, I feel it. And when I tell God that I trust EVERYTHING he does, I mean it. I have never felt more faith in my life than I do right now. Even with as scary as our world has become, it has managed to shed this huge light of faith in me I didn't realize I even had.

So what now?

I continue to pray.

I know that no matter how long this takes, there is a reason for what is happening. Even though there is confusion and nerves centered around this sickness, all of my faith goes towards God and the hopes for an even stronger world one day.

I had someone say to me recently- "If God is so great and real, why would he let this sickness continue to spread and kill people?"

I understand that question, and it's not like I haven't asked myself the same before. Those are the same type of questions I ask when someone I love dies, or someone gets cancer. The normal and expected question is WHY. I understand that fully, and don't blame anyone for those thoughts. But I do not believe God puts a sickness on earth to hurt his people. I believe that bad things happen, and our God leads us down a road we were meant to take.

Whether that's because we're suppose to meet someone new, grow closer to our partner during quarantine, spend more time with the family we haven't seen, pay closer attention to our GOOD health and not taking that for granted-THAT is what I believe our God is capable of doing.

In the last month and a half, I have seen a lot of negativity in the world. But in the last month and a half I have also witnessed families becoming closer by doing random TikTok trends. I have seen groups being created on Facebook to try and involve people in simple things to do daily to aovid boredom. I've seen grandchildren visit their grandparents outside of nursing homes. I have seen the homeless get placed in hotels to avoid the spread of COVID 19. I have witnessed shelters literally being emptied so dogs wouldn't be alone in there! In a scary time, God still promises and brings peace. He brings our world, our jobs, and our minds closer to him and pulls us back into reality to guide us to what's truly important in life: Faith.

There is a lot of bad with all of this-that's just undeniable. I also can't tell you I'm not afraid because that would be a lie.

But I am also happy because I do have faith, and I know I owe that to God. I trust that however long I am stuck inside, God is with me. I know that every soul that passes from this horrible sickness will be welcomed with open arms into Heaven…and I know that even on my darkest days, God holds the light to lead me back to him.

I can't promise that I, you, or any of us will see the end any time soon, but God does. Just keep having the faith in him, and I promise together we can get through this all.