Being vulnerable is something that our society seems to either shy away from or completely embrace. Some friends may share everything that's been going on in their life right up to the very moment they walk in the room, while others may never give you more than a quick response to end the conversation.
Neither is bad, and neither is wrong.
But the option that you prefer for yourself, is completely in your hands. No, you can't force others to be vulnerable and share every intimate detail of their life, but you can share yours. And when you share your struggles and trials, and your dreams and accomplishments, it creates an opportunity for others to open up as well.
So often we get frustrated in our relationships with people, wondering why we aren't instantly comfortable around each other or why it doesn't feel natural to talk about the tough stuff right away. But those things take time, and something as personal and intricate as a life story deserves to be treated with respect and patience.
You wouldn't go on a first date and immediately start pouring out your past issues with trust, family drama, health concerns, heartbreak when the person across from you has barely told you their favorite color. Unless you're just super comfortable and open, which I mean, you do you boo. But for the majority of us, it's super tough and emotionally exhausting to entrust another person with the things that are heavy on our hearts. You wouldn't want to pour your past out for someone to just take that information and leave without giving anything back.
Only when we are willing to share our story, should we be worthy of hearing another.
We shouldn't assume that we deserve to hear someone's story of pain, struggle, redemption, and hope simply because we are sitting there and maybe grabbed coffee with the person once. We earn a person's story. We earn it when we have proven to be trustworthy and thoughtful and nonjudgemental. The sharing of a story is a gift and something that should be kept confidential and guarded.
A life story is what makes a person who they are. It shows the pain beneath the smile when talking about past struggles. It shows love when someones entire face lights up when they're talking about someone they love deeply. It shows strength when talking about overcoming weaknesses and facing fears. A story shows resilience, hope, courage, sorrow, love, and so many others.
A story is an essence of who you are, it is the only thing that 100% belongs to you and only you. Even when you share something, that doesn't mean the person listening will ever understand what you faced... Only you own the story, only you know what it was like to live in that particular world. Only you know the pain and strength it took to reach where you are now.
So before you have the urge to ask someone to tell you their story, ask yourself if you are willing to share yours in return. Because it takes courage to open up, and it takes a lot of heart to trust someone else with a personal, limited edition story. Don't ask to hear a story without the intent of also sharing a bit of your story in return.
