Part of growing up is seeing boys come and go throughout your life. Whether it's your own or your friend's, there's bound to be a crush, a boy you're "talking to", or even a boyfriend. However, I think the one lesson I have learned throughout all of this is that girls do this weird thing where the second a boy comes into their life, it's like all common sense goes out the window. I think we're all guilty of it too. Boys put a block in our minds where all we can think about is them and how much we like them.
While this may seem like an issue for more than one reason, there is one main problem that I think many girls experience when they're on the outside looking in. The problem starts off small. First, they innocently cancel on plans you've had for a week because the boy they like asked them to hang out. Then, it becomes a little bigger. Then they can't come to your birthday dinner unless he can come too. The next thing you know, your business is suddenly shared with him too because she just "can't help but share because she tells him everything."
If you have ever felt this way, you're not alone. I am so tired of my friends not realizing just how consumed they become with their relationships. While this article may specifically be directed at girls, I want you to know that boys do this too. For whatever reason, people in high school and college relationships can't seem to find the balance between friends and their significant other. I don't want to portray myself as the "sad, single friend" because even though that may be true in some ways, I am also seeing this from an unbias standpoint. I am truly happy for my friends. I think where I begin to have the issue with all of this is when people become too consumed. My two best friends are both in relationships and I have seen significant changes in their personalities. This is normal, I know but there is one thing specifically that drives me insane. For all of you in the relationship,
My secrets are not for you to share with your boyfriend.
When I used to share my secrets with you, I was confident that they weren't going anywhere. However, now I feel like I have to mandate what I say based on if I'm okay with your boyfriend and his friends knowing too. It's even worse when two of your friends are dating in the same friend group because there is never anything "off the record". I just miss the days where I could come to you about anything and everything. This seems to be an issue amongst most my friends who have boyfriends. I just think it's awkward when I know he knows but neither of us wants to address it because it wasn't information for his ears in the first place. I have had a lot of issues with this in the past because when I thought I was just telling my best friend something, suddenly her boyfriend knew too. For the most part, this is okay if he's not a total blabbermouth but I don't get to pick the boys you date. It's upsetting when girls don't know where to draw the line with what they choose to tell their boyfriends because it could end up hurting their friends in the long run.
I get that relationships are a total normal thing and for the most part they are great because they make people happy and I love seeing my friends happy. I just think the people need to realize who had their back before the boy got here and how just because you trust him with the stuff I tell you, doesn't mean I do too.