As August rolls into September, college students move back into their dorms and apartments. While I put the finishing touches on my room decorations, my peers are putting the finishing touches on their makeup. It's 9:30 p.m. While I cuddle into my pajamas and slip on my slippers, they zip up their dresses and fasten their stilettos. It's welcome week, which means that for most college students it's time to go out. But for me it is a time that feels very isolated. Honestly, I do not like to go out and party. Don't get me wrong, I love to dress up and look cute. Glitter is one of my favorite accessories. Making new friends and being social is a priority in my life, however drinking is seriously not my thing. This is because any time that I drink I end up a crying mess. All day I fight to hold my emotions in and maintain an upbeat persona, but when I start drinking some hard lemonade it becomes impossible to keep myself together. So in addition to feeling like the room is spinning with a raging headache, I feel like a wrecking ball crashed into my chest and that everything is utterly hopeless. Drinking isn't fun when I feel like the world can't go on anymore. When I drink, depression wins.
The obvious answer then is don't go out and drink. The solution is simple but the reality is not. No one is mad or upset if I regretfully decline their invitations to go out. However, by staying in I end up missing out on so much. Sure, I can hear the stories the next morning, but over time I end up feeling distant from the girls that bond over their fruity cocktails.
Another option is to just go out and not drink. I want to be included in all of the fun and memories too, but I will be the first to say the things people do while drunk are only really fun if you are drinking. Additionally when people notice that you are willing to go out without consuming insane amounts of alcohol you end up becoming the mom that has to clean up after everyone and drive their drunk booties back to bed. That was my experience last year anyway. Need I say more?
Things that are fun to me are impromptu dance parties, Netflix night with buckets of popcorn, going for runs, hanging out at the beach, getting ice cream, making cupcakes, shopping, going rock climbing, playing pickup soccer games, crafting, and talking all night long. So what, I prefer an Arnold Palmer rather than a Long Island Iced Tea. That doesn't mean I am a lame or boring person!
I also want to mention that I don't have anything against the people that live for the night life. If that is what makes you happy, then do it! Embrace it and love the life you live! Partying is 100 percent part of the college experience and is something I fully believe that everyone should do at least a few times. What becomes difficult is when you discover that maybe the party aspect of college is a part that really isn't for you.
So to the college girls that don't enjoy going crazy, I feel for ya. We might as well be a group of aliens that are few and far between. An oddity that people look at and say, "Huh, okay, you do you," and then move on.
The worst part is that it is so incredibly difficult to find someone else that doesn't like to go out, and on top of that shares similar interests and hobbies. My solution surprisingly enough has been to join a sorority.
"Hold up, a sorority? I thought they partied 24/7," is probably the thought currently crossing your mind. While going out is an activity that some may choose to partake in, the benefit of the sorority is that there are constantly other activities, events, and volunteer opportunities going on. So even if I only go to a party once or twice a month, I have daily opportunities to bond and hang with my sisters during the day and evenings. Here we learn to love and accept each other regardless of our differences. The group of strong women that I am a part of chose me and I chose them back. We are united not just as friends but as sisters.
To the girls that don't want to go out or don't enjoy it for any reason, it is okay. Do not give in to the pressure to do something that you don't want to. You just have to put in extra effort to find your group that will love and accept you no matter what. It could be a sorority, musical group, sport, club, or even a study group in the library. The reality is that with more than 20,000 students in a single college campus, there is for sure a group that is right for you. Once you find it, you are home.
