It’s graduation season, and an incident of controversy in my hometown made it possible for me to sit down and talk to some really amazing 8^th grade girls in my community, Alyssa and Naomi. These two 8^th grade girls were students at Edison Middle School, here in Champaign, IL until their promotion last week.

Before their promotion, all the students were in the gym practicing the ceremony. After the practice, the boys were dismissed, while the girls were held back for a “dress code” discussion. I learned about this discussion from a post that went viral on Facebook, but I wanted to hear what the girls had to say about it first hand.

Alyssa and Naomi told me first, the talk (which was given by the Athletic Director(AD), Guidance Counselor and other female teachers) started innocently enough. The female teachers warned the girls not to wear six-inch heels or outfits that would limit their ability to move. They also reminded girls that their graduation outfits should follow the school’s dress code. Then the talk escalated quickly when the teachers began saying that girls are not allowed to show any “curves” or wear an outfit that might reveal that they have any female qualities at all because it is a distraction to boys and showing curves takes away from a girl’s beauty.

Alyssa was really infuriated and offended by the things that they said, so afterward she went to go talk to the teachers, and Naomi went as back up. Talking to the female staff members about this issue made them feel like their voices were not valued or important. The staff members listened to them patronizingly calling them sweetie and honey, but it was obvious that they were not going to change their minds. The female staff members told them that “boys will be boys” and that "boys were built to look at girls in a sexual manner." The staff members also said that the clothing that the boys would be wearing would be scrutinized as well. Meaning that boys would be given rope if their pants were sagging, but if the girls violated their strict dress code, they would be sent home to change or given an "ugly grandma sweater" to cover up.

The girls were told that the school was enforcing this dress code because they have had problems in the past of male attendees at the ceremony cat-calling the girls as they walk on stage. When Alyssa and Naomi asked if a letter could be sent out to parents warning them about acceptable and appropriate conduct, the female staff members told them that was not possible. When they spoke to the principal the next day, she said she was unaware that the girls had been given this dress code talk, and it was possible to send letters to parents. The girls also told me about a friend of theirs who was unable to wear her traditional cultural dress because a part of her midriff was exposed.

Overall, the girls felt very powerless. I wanted to make sure that more people were made aware of this issue. Alyssa and Naomi took a leap of faith when they decided to stand up for what they believe in. When I was able to sit down and talk to these girls, I was very impressed with their maturity. Kids in their school feel uncomfortable and unsafe with the new rules the dress code has enforced, and the way they were communicated to the students; Alyssa and Naomi were the ones who set out to do something about it. They were concerned with not only the girls who were offended and hurt by this incident but they boys at their school as well. They think it is important that the school teach boys and girls about boundaries, rape-culture, and what is appropriate.

One of the things I was most impressed with when I spoke with Alyssa and Naomi, was how firm they are in their beliefs. They told me one of the biggest problems they had with the dress code was how it limits self-expression. They believe that it is important for people to feel safe to be themselves at school. They understand that when it comes to clothing there are some limitations to this, but they feel strongly about the dress code at their school sexual objectifies girls that are 11-14 years old.

For Alyssa and Naomi, they really just want to assure that everyone at their former school feels safe, especially their former classmates, and siblings that are still attending the school. It is important to them that everyone feel safe to be themselves and express themselves at school. They told me that the things the AD and guidance counselor said to the girls were offensive not just to girls, but to boys as well. Implying that boys have no control over what they like, how they act or their preferences, so they also did this to stand up for the boys as well.

I asked the girls what quote they would live by, and why. Alyssa said her mom always tells her “You’ll never regret being kind” she says she tries to always follow what her mom says. This quote is something she tries to live by because she wants to help people by standing up for what she believes in. Naomi said, “Bombs away” meaning you just have to go for it. Naomi said that to her, being loyal is important, so you have to follow through with what you believe in and what you say you’re going to do.

I decided to write this article this week not to cast a shadow on a nearby middle school (although let’s be honest what they did is pretty unacceptable). I wanted to show two young adults that their voice matters, and they can make a difference. I feel so honored to have gotten to sit down with these girls, and I know they will accomplish big things in high school and beyond.