Girls Just Want To Be Loved?
Start writing a post
Relationships

Girls Just Want To Be Loved?

The problem with single shaming and why it's OK to not be in a relationship.

314
Girls Just Want To Be Loved?
Google

As a young woman in her early twenties I face all the same situations all early twenty something year olds face such as finishing school, establishing a career, and just regular daily issues of trying to survive. However I have notice one difference that men don't have to deal with compared to us women, and that is this intangible need to be in a relationship.

As women, or humans in general, we all have the need to want to receive and give love. It is a scientific fact that's been proven by many renowned sociologists. What I can't quite understand is the excessive pressure that women face to obtain this love in the form of a romantic partnership at such a young age. Being a young woman and also having peers who are around my age, one of our biggest issues are men. I have to admit that I myself have fallen victim to the stereotypical, "I want or need a man to truly be happy type feeling."

Please don't mistake my remarks as being pessimistic about love cause this is not the case. I do aspire to love and be in a beautiful love, caring and supporting relationship one day, I just don’t see the rush. When did wanting a man become such a strong need that it's something of a validation of who we are as women? As I thought back on the things that could have potentially influenced and forced us to accept the societal pressure to be in a romantic relationship so young, I realized everything around us promoted the need for love. From fairytale stories as young girls, to movies, music, and even magazines, society glorifies the idea of being in a relationship with a man so much that it's all we women see.

The pressure even transferred over into our families. There are numerous amounts of times where I have been asked the condescending question of " Do you have a boyfriend", and of course when I respond with a firm "no" it’s the oh so pitiful I feel bad for you response of "Wow you're too pretty to not have a boyfriend." I don’t understand why it never occurred to anyone that maybe I don’t want to be with anyone right now. Maybe life is already hard enough just trying to figure myself out. All this added pressure to be loved by a man has made so many women, including myself, search for something we might not necessarily need right now.

Why at 21 is there so much pressure to have dedicated myself to someone else. I can barely at times support myself and figure out the things that I need to get through a day and now on top of it all I have to find a man. Whatever happened to being independent? Whatever happened to glorifying a woman for doing what she wants when she wants to without a man’s approval? I mean it is 2016 and the consistent single shaming has to end. Being in a relationship is beautiful but not necessary, at least not right now it's not. Being in your twenties should be the most care-free risk taking moments in your life. For most of us it might be the only time in our lives where we can truly be selfish and have the ability to exert our independence without thinking of others. But yet the ones who do take this opportunity and use it to their advantage they're shamed and pressured into dating just to do it, just to say they have someone.

Maybe it is time for society to accept that maybe, just maybe, all girls don’t want to be loved. Some girls just enjoy being young wild and free and why shouldn’t they? Why can’t I be proud of being alone and being all about me all the time. Heck, who knows if I will ever get this chance to be this way again. Sometimes after a long day the idea of coming home to my nice warm bed and not a man actually excites me and I am done feeling bad for it. So it is about time we commend all women who have chosen to be single and be proud of it because being without a significant other is not and will never be the end of the world.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

71262
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

133382
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments