I am a college student and I have never had a boyfriend. When I say that to people they often do something like gasp or say ‘Are you serious?’ It is so foreign to people that I have waited this long. I know I am not the only one in this boat, and so I wanted to explain why being patient is okay.
In today’s world, we are constantly surrounded by people that find their value in other people and even in relationships. Some people will settle for anyone that will give them that feeling of value or confidence. We put our value in the opinion of other people, when we should live knowing that we have a God who sees us as beautiful and valuable. Our relationship with God is the most important relationship we can have, and all other relationships will fall short of that. So why do we place our value in them? Don’t focus on people’s opinion of you, but what you can do to serve them for the Lord. Don’t seek relationships simply to make yourself feel complete. You have a God who can fill you like nothing else.
Being a new college student is really exciting and you might be going into it thinking that you are going to meet all of these new amazing guys and are secretly hoping to meet Mr. Right your freshman year in some adorable Nicholas Sparks novel kind of way. It is really hard to not constantly be looking for this guy when you have such a desire in your heart and you are surrounded by people that have someone that means so much to them. Even when I watch cute romantic movies I get the feeling of ‘oh man I want that’. Sometimes it is really hard to be so patient. I say to myself that I am ready to be in a relationship and am constantly wondering why God is making me wait so long. People always say that you will meet the right person when you stop looking, but honestly, it is really hard to do that. My checklist of what I want in a man is pretty short, but can be hard to find. He has to love Jesus with all his heart, treat every person with kindness, be able to make me laugh, and make me feel beautiful. Some people have told me that I am being too picky, or that I am never going to find someone perfect. The thing is, I am not looking for someone perfect. I am waiting for someone that knows that he is not perfect, and surrenders himself to Jesus because he knows that.
That is sometimes really hard to find in college. A lot people believe in Jesus, but living for Him is a completely different thing. I am waiting for someone that will truly live for Him and will bring me even closer to the Lord, while pushing me to be a better person in every aspect of my life. I am also looking for someone that is marriage potential. This is probably where I differ from a lot of college students. I am not saying that the first guy I ever date will for sure be the one that I end up marrying. I am saying that he has to have the potential to be the guy, or else what is the point? I am someone who fully invests their heart into people, and I know that when I do meet someone special they will have my heart. I am not willing to give it away so easily to someone who I know will just break it eventually. Seeking someone who is marriage material is not the easiest thing to do at my age, but that is why I am choosing to give God the reigns on this one. I think a God centered relationship will be worth the wait.
I want to encourage all of the girls out there who are in the period of waiting, like me. God has us in this season for a reason that only He knows. We just have to trust that He has someone out there who will help us serve Him, and we will meet that person at the time that fits God’s perfect plan. Even when things like ‘Relationship Goals’ are constantly surrounding us, tempting us to doubt why God has us in this time of waiting, we must simply thrive where we are right now. He will bring the right guy along when the timing is perfect, so there is no use in worrying about it every time you walk around campus, or anywhere for that matter. People around you might be going out with all of these guys and you might be really jealous of what they have, but don’t worry. It is okay to be patient. Don’t get so caught up in looking for a guy that you miss amazing opportunities that God is putting right in front of you right now. God gives us all a purpose in life. Our purpose is not to find our ‘perfect’ guy, but to serve our perfect God. Focus on that right now, and get closer with the Lord. He will fulfill you in every way you need. His understanding surpasses all of our knowledge, and so we must be patient. God knows what he is doing. Thrive where he puts you, and it will all fall into place.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”
Proverbs 3:5-6
Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!
Psalm 27:17
“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
Romans 8:28
